In the game, women relatives that are married off leave the family. Women also die in childbirth--for some strange reason the only non-battle related medical condition in the game that kills people outside of old age (I guess testicular cancer has been cured in this universe). First, let me say that my intention for this discussion is first and foremost, what is good for gameplay. I hear a great deal of people arguing over what is "historically" accurate and it gives me a headache because (1) I was a history major and they're often wrong and (2) this entire game is historically inaccurate from top to bottom and games usually are. Usually claiming to not like something because it's historically inaccurate is just people trying to disguise their personal preferences as objective logic.
This is bad for gameplay because the most logical course of action for the player, and really every family if they were playing intelligently, would be not to marry off your female relatives. I love that in the game women can be critical roles for your kingdom and party in the form of generals, governors, scouts, medics, siege engineers, etc. However, this also means that the relationship gain from marrying them to another family is not even close to worth losing a valuable character. On the converse side, male family members are super valuable because when they get married, you get another valuable character in the form of their wife! You also get all of the children they produce! This makes male family members uber more valuable and also means that the best course of action for your female family members is to make sure they never marry.
A much better mechanic would be to either (1) make the relationship gain from marriage extremely valuable (for instance, perhaps make it so that families won't marry off their women to you unless you return the favor) or (2) make it so that in a marriage, who leaves their family is not determined by sex (i.e. maybe you can bargain for who is joining whose family or maybe the more valuable character gets to stay in their family). That way, men and women have a chance of leaving their old family and joining the new one. Personally, I'd prefer the latter case because I think it's much easier to implement and is better for game balance purposes.
This is bad for gameplay because the most logical course of action for the player, and really every family if they were playing intelligently, would be not to marry off your female relatives. I love that in the game women can be critical roles for your kingdom and party in the form of generals, governors, scouts, medics, siege engineers, etc. However, this also means that the relationship gain from marrying them to another family is not even close to worth losing a valuable character. On the converse side, male family members are super valuable because when they get married, you get another valuable character in the form of their wife! You also get all of the children they produce! This makes male family members uber more valuable and also means that the best course of action for your female family members is to make sure they never marry.
A much better mechanic would be to either (1) make the relationship gain from marriage extremely valuable (for instance, perhaps make it so that families won't marry off their women to you unless you return the favor) or (2) make it so that in a marriage, who leaves their family is not determined by sex (i.e. maybe you can bargain for who is joining whose family or maybe the more valuable character gets to stay in their family). That way, men and women have a chance of leaving their old family and joining the new one. Personally, I'd prefer the latter case because I think it's much easier to implement and is better for game balance purposes.