A_Mustang said:
or
*facepalm*
Ode To Windsoul and Jimmy the Retarted SaddleHorse Also me and Foxcolas stable
- Thread starter orangeknite1
- Start date
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or
*facepalm*
Kapt Torbjorn
Squire
Hm that's odd because mine is named Theodore the Crippled Despot.
Little do you all know that I was the horse breeder who owned windsoul in the beginning, so the horse is (was) mine! I demand repayment for stealing my horse 
*Throws a spear in CtrlAltDe1337's general direction*
orangeknite1
Sergeant Knight at Arms
Wow what has this thread turned into
Venitius
Count
I have a suggestion; when, if 1866 is ported to Warband, there should be an event/map that goes like so;
Competitors for Windsoul mount up on another horse and go to a starting position.
They wish to ride to another position on the other side of the map. This first one to arrive gets the horse. If all of them die, it is restarted. There are no hiding places, just a long windy track that covers most of the map in a canyon. There are bridges across the canyon and specialized firing positions for the "defenders".
Everyone else has to stop them except an "independent" adjudicator who stands at the finish line behind a Gatling Gun or a cannon loaded with canister. Which can be fired and reloaded and fired again.
All weapons from Native & 1866 are allowed. Including the;
Double Eight Gauge
Sharps Rifle
Coachgun
Nickel-Plated Winchester Rifle
Things that explode after you threw them and they landed somewhere
Cheese!
All of these are at a reduced rate of course!
The defenders get a herring and non-ranged weapons.
Once the winner is declared, he/she and Windsoul is cut/hacked/smashed/bashed/whacked to death by Cleavers and axes and everyone eats the roasted horse meat with cheese and gammon and cheese and bacon and cheese and chicken and cheese and ham sandwiches and cheese and tea and cheese and brandy and cheese and cabbages and cheese except not cabbages and roast pork and cheese and ham and cheese and turkey and cheese and pate and sausages and cheese and gravy and cheese and cake and cheese on toast and fish and cheese.
What does everyone think? It's just a simple race/objective map. Except with a slight difference.
Competitors for Windsoul mount up on another horse and go to a starting position.
They wish to ride to another position on the other side of the map. This first one to arrive gets the horse. If all of them die, it is restarted. There are no hiding places, just a long windy track that covers most of the map in a canyon. There are bridges across the canyon and specialized firing positions for the "defenders".
Everyone else has to stop them except an "independent" adjudicator who stands at the finish line behind a Gatling Gun or a cannon loaded with canister. Which can be fired and reloaded and fired again.
All weapons from Native & 1866 are allowed. Including the;
Double Eight Gauge
Sharps Rifle
Coachgun
Nickel-Plated Winchester Rifle
Things that explode after you threw them and they landed somewhere
Cheese!
All of these are at a reduced rate of course!
The defenders get a herring and non-ranged weapons.
Once the winner is declared, he/she and Windsoul is cut/hacked/smashed/bashed/whacked to death by Cleavers and axes and everyone eats the roasted horse meat with cheese and gammon and cheese and bacon and cheese and chicken and cheese and ham sandwiches and cheese and tea and cheese and brandy and cheese and cabbages and cheese except not cabbages and roast pork and cheese and ham and cheese and turkey and cheese and pate and sausages and cheese and gravy and cheese and cake and cheese on toast and fish and cheese.
What does everyone think? It's just a simple race/objective map. Except with a slight difference.
Guys, guys, guys.
You can't forget my horse! Jimmah the retarded saddlehorse/hunter.
It all started one day in the map called, field by a river..
We were all relaxing in the hot warm glow of the sun, sitting on the steps of one of the small farm houses.
Now, it had been a nice season for wheat and we already harvested most of it so it was our small break. We were supposed to get this wheat to the near by Rhodok Outpost.
But instead we decided to bake a delicious array of baked good, we cooked for about five hours using the stoves inside of the tool house.
We came out proud happy beyond belief think we made a wonderful batch of pastries, but then one of our horses (Mine) decided to walk up to the breads, inhaling a waft of the sweet smelling scent. He trotted around with pleasure hoping and pleading for one of the baked goods. Of course I agreed with Jimmy, he was my favorite horse after all.
I slowly placed one of the breads on the ground, trying not to excite him too much. He didn't much mind the small amount of dirt that was now on the bottom. He quickly devoured the the piece of doughy bread. We all stared at the steed as he stiffened. As if he was a inanimate object... He quickly spread out his legs letting his teeth show letting out a large funny sounding NEH. He stayed in this position for about a hour... We got tired so we took a nap, it was pouring with rain... He was still standing there. I scratched my head, wiping of some of the rain... So I mounted Jimmy, he began to buck around and bolted off across the field. I was slightly surprised I never seen Jimmy act so strangely, we arrived at the windmill, a man came walking out with with a torch and a club... He stared at me and Jimmy slowly slurring these exact words. "We're gonna break your legsh noice and shlow."
Jimmy took immediate action after multiple men came running through the fog. He began to buck crushing the skulls of his opponents, blood and brain matter strewn across the ground. The leader began to run, as fast as he could. But it wasn't enough he slipped in a small patch of mud, his face planting into the ground. We was crawling away backwards, screaming in a odd way... Jimmy NEY'ed...
And stomped his face in with the metal horse shoe attached to his hoof.. He face was now inverted blood slowly pouring from the man's eye sockets and mouth, his nose was no longer visible. Bloody bone was hidden by the mud and dirt.
For his courageous acts against River Pirates, Jimmy earned the name "Jimmah the retarded Saddlehorse" I will always be in his dept and I shall always love him.
You can't forget my horse! Jimmah the retarded saddlehorse/hunter.
It all started one day in the map called, field by a river..
We were all relaxing in the hot warm glow of the sun, sitting on the steps of one of the small farm houses.
Now, it had been a nice season for wheat and we already harvested most of it so it was our small break. We were supposed to get this wheat to the near by Rhodok Outpost.
But instead we decided to bake a delicious array of baked good, we cooked for about five hours using the stoves inside of the tool house.
We came out proud happy beyond belief think we made a wonderful batch of pastries, but then one of our horses (Mine) decided to walk up to the breads, inhaling a waft of the sweet smelling scent. He trotted around with pleasure hoping and pleading for one of the baked goods. Of course I agreed with Jimmy, he was my favorite horse after all.
I slowly placed one of the breads on the ground, trying not to excite him too much. He didn't much mind the small amount of dirt that was now on the bottom. He quickly devoured the the piece of doughy bread. We all stared at the steed as he stiffened. As if he was a inanimate object... He quickly spread out his legs letting his teeth show letting out a large funny sounding NEH. He stayed in this position for about a hour... We got tired so we took a nap, it was pouring with rain... He was still standing there. I scratched my head, wiping of some of the rain... So I mounted Jimmy, he began to buck around and bolted off across the field. I was slightly surprised I never seen Jimmy act so strangely, we arrived at the windmill, a man came walking out with with a torch and a club... He stared at me and Jimmy slowly slurring these exact words. "We're gonna break your legsh noice and shlow."
Jimmy took immediate action after multiple men came running through the fog. He began to buck crushing the skulls of his opponents, blood and brain matter strewn across the ground. The leader began to run, as fast as he could. But it wasn't enough he slipped in a small patch of mud, his face planting into the ground. We was crawling away backwards, screaming in a odd way... Jimmy NEY'ed...
And stomped his face in with the metal horse shoe attached to his hoof.. He face was now inverted blood slowly pouring from the man's eye sockets and mouth, his nose was no longer visible. Bloody bone was hidden by the mud and dirt.
For his courageous acts against River Pirates, Jimmy earned the name "Jimmah the retarded Saddlehorse" I will always be in his dept and I shall always love him.
Venitius
Count
In theory it should be easy to set up the map, but I'm no modder, so I wouldn't know what to think. The "independent" adjudicator would decide who won along with a coroner who would identify the corpses, and it would effectively be a really long siege map with the attackers spawning at one end of the canyon and at the other end of the long, winding canyon there would be the finish point with the flag that is captured in half a second. Of course the riders get 10 secs to get ready while the defenders get in position. I think there should also be barriers such as AI phalanxes, flaming logs and barricades. I wouldn't take part in the race itself if it ever took place, but I'd play before and after the main race, certainly. It should be a new map form! Death ride? Race with a slight difference? Charge to a Coachgun Barrel Glory?
