If you could kill a noble...

[John Frederick]

Just starting up a thread pretty much so I can rant and get your opinions. With that said; who would you kill? Any noble that ticked you off and wished you could do more than knock him unconscious? I certainly do.

I would kill Count Despin, for being the biggest coward and traitor ever. With my armies of about 800+ men closing in on him fleeing from a battle with about 40 survivors, and me about to confront him one last time, he leaves Swadia and joins the Nords henceforth being known as Jarl Despin. ARGH!

So what do you guys think? Who would you kill and why?

 

[TheBali]

I would kill King Harlaus. There's no food remaining at his feast for me when I'm done saving Swadia. I mean, he could AT LEAST keep some pork safe...

 

[Indra]

One of the Swadian Lords. I forget his name, I'll remember it later. Just ALWAYS raiding my lands. I  build prisoner towers just to stick this guy in there to rot.

 

[Schemer]

King Ragnar. Bastard conquers nearly everywhere in all my saves, without my help. He is the largest threat to Calradia.

King Harlaus, on the other hand. I hope he lives forever. He's the only king that knows how to party. Besides me, of course.

 

[Lord Brutus]

I'd kill any lord who called me "an impudent whelp" or "a heap of filth". Dishonorable lords do not deserve to procreate, so I'd probably kill their wives too. lol

 

[Jaer Selorn]

Why, nearly everyone I capture. Number one in death list, of cource, would be King Ragnar, for the reasons specified in Bali's post.

 

[The Dominator]

King Graveth can take a hike straight to the gallows!!

King Yaroglek can go drown himself!!

Sultan Hakim can just fusk off and get squashed by ameteorite or somthing!!

King Ragnar can just be beheaded for i like beheadng!!

Sanjar Khan can just go stand infront of a horde of rampaging Cows and ge squashed flat!!

King Harlaus can die an Honreble death in battle!!

Hmmm woops i guess that leaves ME as the sole survving King!! 

 

[killer-blead]

I would definitly kill Emir Quryas. That bastard just hates me and tries to betray/kill/stop me in every game I've started in warband.

I'm going to lock him away for good and wait for the 'killer' patch to execute him.

 

[John Frederick]

Edit:

I now want to kill Count Trimbau for trying to provoke a war between my kingdom and Rhodoks. He never really liked me either, maybe I shouldn't have soiled his "good" name. 

 

[Thandruin]

King Graveth can take a hike straight to the gallows!!

King Yaroglek can go drown himself!!

Sultan Hakim can just fusk off and get squashed by ameteorite or somthing!!

King Ragnar can just be beheaded for i like beheadng!!

Sanjar Khan can just go stand infront of a horde of rampaging Cows and ge squashed flat!!

King Harlaus can die an Honreble death in battle!!

Hmmm woops i guess that leaves ME as the sole survving King!! 

Then you're also the only king left to be annihilated
Furthermore, I wouldn't really want to kill off the nobles who piss me off - then they wouldn't suffer properly for their wrongdoings. However, I would very much like
to 'keelhaul' Boyar Ghulassen up and down the walls of Reindi Castle for hiding his larded behind in the keep with 200+ soldiers, while the entire Kingdom of Rhodok came crushing down on my army and wiped poor Meriga's company off the map.

 

[tumph]

Jarl Logarson for hating me for no reason(well, I did beat him in a duel, but he hated me before that too).

 

[Fry]

I'd whack every claimant. I'm trying to unify Calradia and end this discord, damnit! By the time I'm done with your former home, there won't be a throne left to usurp.

 

[LEGION3000]

Is someone implementing the killing of nobles?  I've been thinking of putting that bit of code into my own mod but it is pretty complex and from the old M&B so no telling if it will work in Warband.

Also, I would murdalize all those Khergit noyan that continuously raid my settlements.  Apparently locking them in the tower for all eternity doesn't work now that they are released when you make peace.  I need a more permanent solution.

 

[Ace Dick]

Jarl Aedin. I've captured him so many times... And I don't even have a castle, just a town. King Yaroglek is such a ***** for not giving me one. I've been a better vassal than anyone! Also, Jarl Olaf for raiding my town a few times. Hell, all of the Nords for all I care. Long live the Vaegirs and all that.

 

[rambo]

King Graveth can take a hike straight to the gallows!!

King Yaroglek can go drown himself!!

Sultan Hakim can just fusk off and get squashed by ameteorite or somthing!!

King Ragnar can just be beheaded for i like beheadng!!

Sanjar Khan can just go stand infront of a horde of rampaging Cows and ge squashed flat!!

King Harlaus can die an Honreble death in battle!!

Hmmm woops i guess that leaves ME as the sole survving King!! 

Lol... that is too easy, almost borring xD

 

[baamonster]

there was a mod in the original m&b where you can execute a lord that's your prisoner. But after that you get minus a billion with everyone else....

 

[Grimmend]

King Graveth can take a hike straight to the gallows!!

King Yaroglek can go drown himself!!

Sultan Hakim can just fusk off and get squashed by ameteorite or somthing!!

King Ragnar can just be beheaded for i like beheadng!!

Sanjar Khan can just go stand infront of a horde of rampaging Cows and ge squashed flat!!

King Harlaus can die an Honreble death in battle!!

Hmmm woops i guess that leaves ME as the sole survving King!! 

Thats far too easy on them, instead, how about making it Kings vs. Claimants, winners gets to be you servants 

 

[RndmNumGenerator]

Emir... Gwahana? Something that that. Fight him in battle, and he gets mad if he wins, gets mad if he loses, gets mad if you let him go, gets mad if you take him prisoner, is indifferent if you save his ass. No way to please that guy.

 

[Dent]

So far nobody. Although I'm starting to dislike Boyar Vlan.

 

[Arnas]

Plais.
In every game of mine plais hates me. And usually, he provokes it.