I figured if we could come up with a guide now it might save any further ****storms later 
Firstly, the difference between kicking / banning, which you should be aware of anyway, but bears repeating:
Kicking dumps the player to the lobby. They can rejoin again immediately
Banning dumps the player to the lobby. They cannot rejoin until the server is reset, which may be weeks, or may be minutes. Who knows.
Kicking - not a big deal. Banning - huge deal.
Offences which warrant a ban:
1. Any behaviour which is also marked as "may result in instant ban" under the forum rules. Piracy, linking to warez, linking to porn, persistent harassment of a racial/sexual/religious nature 1 and so forth.
2. As a last resort, when a player refuses to comply with a reasonable request to desist in breaking the rules 2
3. As a last resort, if a player shows persistent rule breaking behaviour over a period of time 3
As a general rule, I expect a warning to be given before someone is banned for anything, however most offences in case 1 this can be waived; if someone's posting links to warez or porn in the chat then they're incurring a legal risk for Taleworlds, and minimising risk is always a good strategy. Similarly, I doubt anyone speaking at length regarding how all the Jews should have died at Auschwitz has much of a "didn't mean to cause offence" defence either.
Offences warranting a kick:
1. Unsportsman like behaviour. This includes but is not limited to, offensive language, obstructing or griefing players, spamming the chat channel, spamming polls, exploiting bugs or similar for an advantage, you get the idea.
2. As a warning, if a player has committed an offence which would usually result in a ban, but you wish to give them the benefit of the doubt
3. Harassment via either in game actions or chat of any individual player or group of players. This covers arguing with an admin, deliberately ruining duels and similar behaviour.
4. Glitching, whether deliberate or not. If for example a player becomes invisible, gets stuck on scenery or whatever, feel free to kick them if they cannot sort it out themselves.
5. AFK. If a player looks to be AFK then a kick will soon reveal if there's any sign of life.
Uncommon sense:
1 Key word here is persistent. A bunch of kids calling each other Teh Gay does not constitute harassment, though of course feel free to warn and/or kick for offensive language. Someone joining the server with the name AdolfHitler who proceeds to repeatedly spam the chat with "Jews are teh Untermensch" on the other hand can be banned forthwith.
2 Not just "quit being a ****" "no" "BAN". This should mainly be a case of "what you just did should be an instant ban, but I'll give you a second chance" territory, not an ultimatum.
3 i.e. As we've had in the past where players have repeatedly and persistently been the cause of problems such that it's easier to simply remove them than be forced to deal with their crap. FF's founding members spring to mind.
Golden Rule
If in doubt, kick them out. Banning is irreversible beyond rebooting the server, kicking isn't. If you're not sure whether what the player is doing is worth a ban then kick them. Repeatedly if necessary. No matter what they say they'll get tired of being punted long before you get tired of kicking them, so they either comply or give up trying to join the server. Most players should be smart enough to bring it up here if they get repeatedly kicked from a game, at which point we can sort it out off the server.
Observations:
Never use a ban as a threat unless you're comfortable with carrying it out. As soon as you tell a player "if you don't do what I say I'll ban you" you're committing yourself to a course of action which isn't a good thing. You want to keep your options open, and you don't want to put them in a position to call your bluff. Trolls ain't as stupid as they look, the instant you threaten to ban them they'll look for the moral high ground, usually by refusing to do what you've asked while not actually doing anything else wrong, so they can claim you banned them because you could rather than because they deserved it. Best not to give them the opportunity. If you absolutely must you can imply; "that's the sort of behaviour that could get you banned", or you can always use a kick "If you don't stop it I'll kick the pair of you", but always keep the ball in your court.
Never argue with a player over something either. If you kick / ban a player and they ask for an explanation then of course you should give one, if they want to argue or debate however tell them to take it to PM or the forums. Don't rise to the bait, because trolls like to group up when facing authority. Tell them if they have a problem to take it up on the forum, if they refuse to let it drop then kick them. Don't ban, because then it will look like you're abusing your power. Kicking them constantly will see them either get the message or quit the server, either way it stops you looking like a megalomaniac and forces them to take it up here if they want to pursue it, so job done.
Covering your arse:
As a general rule, anytime you ban a player for any reason it pays to come here ASAP and report it in the relevant thread. That way, we can see who banned whom when, and the reason for it. If nothing else it will at least prove your motives were honest.
Kicks on the other hand I wouldn't bother with. At the end of the day the worst a player loses is any cash, equipment and kill streak they happened to have. Not exactly a national emergency, and play long enough and Mr Assertion Failed will do the same thing.
Firstly, the difference between kicking / banning, which you should be aware of anyway, but bears repeating:
Kicking dumps the player to the lobby. They can rejoin again immediately
Banning dumps the player to the lobby. They cannot rejoin until the server is reset, which may be weeks, or may be minutes. Who knows.
Kicking - not a big deal. Banning - huge deal.
Offences which warrant a ban:
1. Any behaviour which is also marked as "may result in instant ban" under the forum rules. Piracy, linking to warez, linking to porn, persistent harassment of a racial/sexual/religious nature 1 and so forth.
2. As a last resort, when a player refuses to comply with a reasonable request to desist in breaking the rules 2
3. As a last resort, if a player shows persistent rule breaking behaviour over a period of time 3
As a general rule, I expect a warning to be given before someone is banned for anything, however most offences in case 1 this can be waived; if someone's posting links to warez or porn in the chat then they're incurring a legal risk for Taleworlds, and minimising risk is always a good strategy. Similarly, I doubt anyone speaking at length regarding how all the Jews should have died at Auschwitz has much of a "didn't mean to cause offence" defence either.
Offences warranting a kick:
1. Unsportsman like behaviour. This includes but is not limited to, offensive language, obstructing or griefing players, spamming the chat channel, spamming polls, exploiting bugs or similar for an advantage, you get the idea.
2. As a warning, if a player has committed an offence which would usually result in a ban, but you wish to give them the benefit of the doubt
3. Harassment via either in game actions or chat of any individual player or group of players. This covers arguing with an admin, deliberately ruining duels and similar behaviour.
4. Glitching, whether deliberate or not. If for example a player becomes invisible, gets stuck on scenery or whatever, feel free to kick them if they cannot sort it out themselves.
5. AFK. If a player looks to be AFK then a kick will soon reveal if there's any sign of life.
Uncommon sense:
1 Key word here is persistent. A bunch of kids calling each other Teh Gay does not constitute harassment, though of course feel free to warn and/or kick for offensive language. Someone joining the server with the name AdolfHitler who proceeds to repeatedly spam the chat with "Jews are teh Untermensch" on the other hand can be banned forthwith.
2 Not just "quit being a ****" "no" "BAN". This should mainly be a case of "what you just did should be an instant ban, but I'll give you a second chance" territory, not an ultimatum.
3 i.e. As we've had in the past where players have repeatedly and persistently been the cause of problems such that it's easier to simply remove them than be forced to deal with their crap. FF's founding members spring to mind.
Golden Rule
If in doubt, kick them out. Banning is irreversible beyond rebooting the server, kicking isn't. If you're not sure whether what the player is doing is worth a ban then kick them. Repeatedly if necessary. No matter what they say they'll get tired of being punted long before you get tired of kicking them, so they either comply or give up trying to join the server. Most players should be smart enough to bring it up here if they get repeatedly kicked from a game, at which point we can sort it out off the server.
Observations:
Never use a ban as a threat unless you're comfortable with carrying it out. As soon as you tell a player "if you don't do what I say I'll ban you" you're committing yourself to a course of action which isn't a good thing. You want to keep your options open, and you don't want to put them in a position to call your bluff. Trolls ain't as stupid as they look, the instant you threaten to ban them they'll look for the moral high ground, usually by refusing to do what you've asked while not actually doing anything else wrong, so they can claim you banned them because you could rather than because they deserved it. Best not to give them the opportunity. If you absolutely must you can imply; "that's the sort of behaviour that could get you banned", or you can always use a kick "If you don't stop it I'll kick the pair of you", but always keep the ball in your court.
Never argue with a player over something either. If you kick / ban a player and they ask for an explanation then of course you should give one, if they want to argue or debate however tell them to take it to PM or the forums. Don't rise to the bait, because trolls like to group up when facing authority. Tell them if they have a problem to take it up on the forum, if they refuse to let it drop then kick them. Don't ban, because then it will look like you're abusing your power. Kicking them constantly will see them either get the message or quit the server, either way it stops you looking like a megalomaniac and forces them to take it up here if they want to pursue it, so job done.
Covering your arse:
As a general rule, anytime you ban a player for any reason it pays to come here ASAP and report it in the relevant thread. That way, we can see who banned whom when, and the reason for it. If nothing else it will at least prove your motives were honest.
Kicks on the other hand I wouldn't bother with. At the end of the day the worst a player loses is any cash, equipment and kill streak they happened to have. Not exactly a national emergency, and play long enough and Mr Assertion Failed will do the same thing.
If you get it wrong then it's a simple matter to apologise, no real harm done and everyone can get on with the important activity of pushing pointy bits of metal into each other.
