Hi ks1966,
First of all, thank you for reaching us and us the support forum.
Can you provide us your savegame to check the case? It usually take some time after all the lords have been defected/defected.
To find the king, like in other WB titles, you can use the character panel and it should give you some clues or use some lady of the kingdom,
Regards,
CeltiberoCaesar