Dating Thread, v. I
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Duh
Duke
My girlfriend has been taking up modelling a while ago and i was generally involved, in that she likes to discuss and show the things she does. Recently she had a shoot that was supposed to be slightly revealing and she was worried that i wouldnt like it. I told her i dont have a problem with it, its her body after all, but she should make sure its not used inappropriately and what not. She was happy, but ended up telling me it would be all with underwear, blankets, etc and the photographer would be a woman. After the shoot she tells me that she was so surprised that it was a guy (apparently the nickname robby doesnt give that away) and she ended up having a couple act photos ("i didnt know he would be taking a shot from that angle", but no clothing worn). I am feeling really uneasy about it, not because of what the pics show, but rather about the way she handled this whole thing. Plus i worry that whatever im gonna say or do is gonna come across as me being upset about the nudes rather than her ridiculously obvious lies. I really dont get it, why even bring these things up to get my "permission", then lie, then reveal the lie?
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That's pretty tough. On the one hand obviously if you bring up her lie then it could really screw stuff up, but on the other if you just leave it be then it may well happen again.
I wouldn't presume to be able to give you advice here - I've never been in a situation nearly as difficult as this. If it were me I'd want to talk to her about it, though I'd probably do my best to keep things from getting too heated.
At the end of the day I think that letting big stuff like this go is actually more harmful to a relationship than helpful - it sets a trend of lying that could potentially escalate in the future, besides all the other issues connected with bottling up your feelings. However, as I said - I'm in no way experienced enough for you to make a decision based upon my advice. You're probably better off waiting for someone with a few more long-term relationships under their belt than me
Duh said:
That's pretty tough. On the one hand obviously if you bring up her lie then it could really screw stuff up, but on the other if you just leave it be then it may well happen again.
I wouldn't presume to be able to give you advice here - I've never been in a situation nearly as difficult as this. If it were me I'd want to talk to her about it, though I'd probably do my best to keep things from getting too heated.
At the end of the day I think that letting big stuff like this go is actually more harmful to a relationship than helpful - it sets a trend of lying that could potentially escalate in the future, besides all the other issues connected with bottling up your feelings. However, as I said - I'm in no way experienced enough for you to make a decision based upon my advice. You're probably better off waiting for someone with a few more long-term relationships under their belt than me
Duh
Duke
I pretty much immediately told her that i was disappointed in her changing story. Thats when i got the whole "I didnt know what pics he would be taking/from those angles" routine. Went ahead and said that i dont really believe that and this stuff is ****ing with my trust towards her and she just got upset about me not believing her, then stated we should drop the topic. I was just wondering what other people would think of the situation. Plus venting helps
user1324865215
Just make sure you tell her you're disappointing about lying, not the modeling. She may just put the two together and make more problems.
Aye, that. Say you'd appreciate if she at least was honest in the future regarding the nature of her photoshoots, that you prefer she doesn't lie just to make you feel better about it and that you'd trust her more if she did so and that you could learn to cope with it.
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Duh
Duke
As i said, she already had my blessing to do the photo shoot she wants, but chose to make up a story for this, then revealed the lies in a rather odd fashion. What is really annoying me is that it is such an unnecassary situation, which will probably affect my trust towards her in general.
Yeah, I think that was her intention, but that doesn't mean it's okay as she can grow to occult more serious ****. Do tell her you rather know the truth even if it won't be super pleasing to you, that you can deal with it and you just want her to be sincere and you want to know you can trust her.
Mage246
My girlfriend has been away for the past 1.5 weeks. It's the longest we've been apart. So ronery . She'll be back next Sunday though.
. She'll be back next Sunday though.
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