Double post, yada yada.
Social isolation and loneliness have really been eating at me lately. Covid hasn't affected me as much as it has other people, but it still doesn't help when you've been trying for years to teach yourself to be social and to make friends and then this **** happens and we're not supposed to see people. I mean, I still do see people, but it's at work so it's all farmers and people who are a lot older than me. I tend to get lonely around the holidays, but this year I thought maybe I'd avoid that if I didn't get into the holiday spirit as much. That almost worked, but then the loneliness came back and hit harder than it has in a while. There's a history of depression on one side of my family, and the last few weeks have made me think that I might have it, too. I think I may have to talk to someone (like my doctor) about that at some point.
On the plus side, I was able to good talk with my mother this evening about some of this stuff, which was really nice. Tbh that's why I'm writing this, so I don't forget about that talk. She was surprisingly understanding. I never thought she grasped how I felt (she's about as antisocial as they come), but tonight it seemed she did. That had been one of the many reasons our relationship has suffered over the past year or so, so this was the first good talk we'd had in a while. So yeah, that was nice. Morale temporarily boosted. I'll just have to take a day (or a few hours) at a time, I guess. Here's to an end of Covid and the world returning to normal. When that happens, maybe we can all (as in, the world) get out more.