What's on your mind?

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Ikea Knight

Sergeant Knight
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I just read Adorno's recent post one what made you laugh today about how a delirious woman misstook him for husband.
That reminded me of a when I had to join my aunt on her visit to her mother in law in a nursery home.
I was in elementary school back then, I wasn't older then ten.
While I was there, a group of women approached us and one of them misstook me for her nephew.
I was asked by my aunt to be so kind to spent some time with these old ladies and I reluctanly did. I think I played chess with one of them and all the time this one women was asking about my supposed parents and calling me by her nephew's name. Everytime I told her that she is mistaking me for someone else. Well, for me being a small, shy, boy it was a really uncomfortable situation and a little bit scary. I was so happy when after a two-hour-long eternatiy I was finally picked-up to leave.
Well, I can understand that it probably ment a lot to these old ladies but right now I am a little bit angry with my aunt, that she just left me with strangers.
I haven't remembered this day in ages or maybe even ever.
 
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I've been "living" in my sister's apartment for the last 2 weeks while she's in america. It's been great. It's closer into central london than where I live so there are even more dirty grocers run by kurds and eastern european shops where they seem shocked that a black man who is already carrying a mountain of food is looking at the Kizsona and Lukanka like an old woman.

Being able to go out when I want, cook what I want, work literally the entire day and go to bed without having to deal with two very bored, very micromanagey authoritarian parents is amazing. They get angry at me if I cook in bulk, so guess what I've been doing every 3-4 days. The best part is that every ingredient I could possibly think of is within walking distance, and some of it is absurdly cheap. I can cook enough to last me 3 days for just £5.

I thought it would feel weird being locked up in a tiny apartment for 3-4 weeks, but honestly I'm kind of dreading going back. Cooking 3 full pots of whatever fusion nonsense pops into my head is a beautiful feeling.
 

Count Delinard

Lord of Uxkhal
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What's preventing you from living on your own? You literally lived in the middle of rural China for a while, I would imagine you have both the means and the required level of independence to live on your own.
 
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What's preventing you from living on your own?
Rent which exceeds minimum wage by 300% at the lowest, house prices which have increased 10x in the last 30 years, and wages which have remained static for decades.
The only reason my sister can even afford this place is because her husband has rich relatives.

What's preventing you from living on your own? You literally lived in the middle of rural China for a while, I would imagine you have both the means and the required level of independence to live on your own.
If by "lived" you mean I stayed in a tiny concrete mahjong room for 2 weeks then yeah. :lol:
 

Count Delinard

Lord of Uxkhal
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I mean, with your skills and the entire world working remotely now you wouldn't need to stay in London unless

A) You love it way too much
B) You wouldn't consider leaving due to family/SO, etc.

But if neither of those applies, why don't you go somewhere pretty but cheap, where you can get a remote job paid in Pounds or US Dollars and live extremely comfortably?

It doesn't need to be a dangerous **** hole, there are so many places that are amazing, safe, beautiful, and cheap, not only in Europe :smile:
 

Moose!

poorly-drawn
Duke
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Now that corporate workplaces are primarily remote because of the plague, maybe there could be new job opportunities for you that might not have been available when you were searching?
 
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lol no
The UK economy was on life support long before this, and since I'm still ostensibly a graduate in a city with a million unemployed graduates and a 0.1% interest rate undead zombie private sector, there are fewer jobs on offer than I've ever seen.
 

Count Delinard

Lord of Uxkhal
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Why don't you try freelancing through something like Upwork?

If you need help with networking or your LinkedIn you can always send me a PM, I recruit people for a living (well, I used to, I now mostly work on culture but I still have recruiters reporting to me) so I can try to help out :smile:
 
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Mom and dad seem to have won Greencards. They didn't literally win it yet, but they were selected in the lottery and the interview doesn't seem to be selective at all if the random internet people are to be trusted
 
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@Count Delinard @Kentucky James VII I had a similar experience in the US after moving in with my wife. I have experience with data analysis and I am (academically) qualified, but I didn't know anyone in the "right places" (probably didn't help that I moved to a new country). I tried freelancing on Upwork and Kolabtree but I didn't have much luck, they don't seem to select the clients much, if at all. I remember a potential customer on Kolabtree that basically wanted me to do his PhD thesis (which is probably illegal, certainly unethical).

As far as non freelancing jobs go, I applied to I think around 100 positions. I got phone interviews for six, a second in person interview for two. One wanted me to start working for them "on the side", without being paid, then "we'll see how it goes". The second would have been a cool job, but the interview didn't go very well and I probably was not a good fit (too heavy on C++ coding).

Ended up getting a job in academia that does not pay as much but... The professor I work with knew me, and people in the field know me. Will probably end up staying on this career track even if it's not necessarily what I would prefer. Applying for jobs online sure is convenient, but I think in a sense it made the process much harder.
 

kurczak

Section Moderator
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Mom and dad seem to have won Greencards. They didn't literally win it yet, but they were selected in the lottery and the interview doesn't seem to be selective at all if the random internet people are to be trusted
Wtf, congrats. If the interview is anything like the spouse Green Card interview, then they should be fine. They already vetted me (= my identity and the genuineness of the marriage) from the paperwork I had to submit, so they just asked a couple of basic questions to see thatI won't pause to think when we got married etc. Since this is not applicable for lottery, I'm guessing it will be just a formality. They will be probably just want them to bring the originals of birth certificates and other identity stuff and the medical exam results and hand it over in person and take their fingerprints.
 
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Wtf, congrats.
yeah this was my reaction. My parents are usually ask my help for the most basic computer tasks but somehow my dad managed to fill out a form from google translate without mentioning it even once. Then they came "hey your mom seems to have been selected in greencard lottery" Not sure what we gonna do with it since my sister is 9 years old but it can't hurt
 

kurczak

Section Moderator
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Well once you have GC you have to establish residence here and they can take it away if you're gone for longer than, I think a year or maybe just 6 months. I don't know how rigorously they enforce it.
 
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I found out they can also get me in later on since I’m not married. Just a few months ago I decided to settle in Turkey to live with my family. Now I can both work in the US and take my family there. My time spent working here is potentially wasted. And I will also experience decision anxiety once again :sad: I already decided to not do a PhD in economics and I also quitted my master in economics. Now it will be a second big life decision in a single year. Can my 9 year old sister handle emigration? Can my parents who don't speak English at all manage to earn a living? My work experience in Turkey will be null in the US, though I have a degree from Oxford which should work fine. idk
 
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I suggest making sure you understand the implications and how the immigration system works in the US before making any decisions. It might be relatively quick for them to get there, but I don't know that it will be for you. As far as I know the only reliable way for anyone to become a permanent resident through family ties is marrying a US citizen, or being younger than 21 if your parents get a green card. You can get other relatives in as a permanent resident, but it's a much longer process. There's also the fact that green card applications are not exactly cheap, although perhaps that's different with the lottery. Not a lawyer or anything so don't take my word for it, but be aware that the american immigration system is a confusing mess.

Also I would consider what are they going to do for healthcare, depending on how old they are and what health issues they have. And as you say, what kind of job they will do when they get there, unless they have some other source of income. As someone who immigrated relatively recently, I can tell you that the US are not as great to live in as one would sometimes be led to believe from abroad. Especially right now.