What made you laugh today - Fifth Edition

Users who are viewing this thread

kurczak

Section Moderator
WB
A man rides a bike into a pharmacy.
In plains sight, he fills like a 120L bag with stolen goods.
Everybody including the security watches and records it on their drone phones.
A woman suggests police be called. The security shrugs.
The thief rides his bikes out of the pharmacy while the security makes the most halfhearted attempt to take them bag from him. Once.

If you can't see the problem, you are the problem.
 

eddiemccandless

Knight at Arms
WBNWVC
I will say that going through the comment section on that YouTube video made me want to wash my eyes with bleach. I suppose I should have known better than to read them.
 

Cpt. Nemo

The Wurst
Section Moderator
M&BWB
So I work at a kennel now. Today a first-time-here family brought their dog in, as you do, and wanted a quick tour of the place to see how their furry friend will be living for the next week and a half ish. They happened to pass by the kitchen as I was washing food bowls, and the mother asked if I was the kennel chef doing food prep.

"haha no just washing, although sometimes people can get very specific with their dog's meals"

Said family also brought in their dog's food. This dog eats two raw chicken breasts, a raw egg and a large scoop of yogurt twice daily. They also brought in like a dozen raw drumsticks, I guess those are supposed to be treats I have no ****ing idea. We have a two foot high wall of chicken stacked in the fridge. God help us all.
 

Antoine de Saint-Exupéry

Dancing to electro-pop like a robot since 1984
Subforum Moderator
M&BWBNWWF&SVC
A man rides a bike into a pharmacy.
In plains sight, he fills like a 120L bag with stolen goods.
Everybody including the security watches and records it on their drone phones.
A woman suggests police be called. The security shrugs.
The thief rides his bikes out of the pharmacy while the security makes the most halfhearted attempt to take them bag from him. Once.

If you can't see the problem, you are the problem.
for liability reasons, security are often straight up told not to intervene in theft when there's no violence, just observe and report. dude's not hurting anyone, they have clear video of his face - do you think it's worth escalating the situation to physical violence? why? the owners of those places tend to think it's not worth the hassle, and are usually insured anyway. hence the directive to not intervene.
 

Adorno

Bedroom Assassin
Archduke
WBNWM&BVC
His face is not clear, though. It's covered.
Why is there a security guard at all, when security cameras could do his job? Actually, two other people (filming) are already doing it.
It would be interesting if police ever catch the guy. I doubt it.

Shop owners in Denmark have experienced the same, where 2-4 robbers drive up and start emptying a store (often liquor) and then drive off. No guns or anything. And police do nothing because they're burdened by other tasks.
It shows a culture where criminals feel safe doing crimes 'casually', in broad daylight, because no one dares intervene, and police rarely get involved or bother to investigate.
 

Krik

Duke
M&BWB
This is America California. Man, I used to love SF.
I did this several times as a teenager in central Texas with cases of beer, and the store employees acted the exact same way. Like Monty said, stores would rather lose the small amount of merchandise than potentially face a lawsuit for excessive use of force. This isn't the result of California being a lawless wasteland, it's just regular old petty theft.
 

kurczak

Section Moderator
WB
I am well aware that it is a result of corporate policies and, uh, policy policies, and not unique laziness or failure of that particular guard. That's exactly the problem. Yes, American tort law is bizarre, effectively protects criminal scum and is (mostly) not state-based, but decisions to make theft under 1000 dollars mere misdemanor or decision not to prosecute are local.

It's not a victimless crime, somebody has to pay the insurance, you may not feel much empathy for a corporate chain, but it' not like these ****s restrain themselves to big chains and more importantly having something like that happen regularly, or at all really, unpunished, corrodes society and begets more crime and antisocial behavior. The stores in SF specifically have been closing down altogether over these no big deal what's the hassle minor incidents. They can think about it when more and more of the Bay becomes muh food desert and the only stores around are liquor stores and "delis" with bulletproof plexiglass.
 
Last edited:

eddiemccandless

Knight at Arms
WBNWVC
They can think about it when more and more of the Bay becomes muh food desert and the only stores around are liquor stores and "delis" with bulletproof plexiglass.
That is going to happen anyway, but not for the reason you think. People who work on retail simply can not survive on the wages they are being paid in that area, so eventually they will not be able to hire people to do that kind of job (in fact it is already happening). That is also the leading reason for crimes like that one happening by the way. It is a system that just can not work, and instead of trying to find a way to fix it now we are exporting it in other cities (Seattle, Boston, NYC all suffer from similar issues, although not quite as bad, and now it's starting in places like Salt Lake City too).

So I work at a kennel now. Today a first-time-here family brought their dog in, as you do, and wanted a quick tour of the place to see how their furry friend will be living for the next week and a half ish. They happened to pass by the kitchen as I was washing food bowls, and the mother asked if I was the kennel chef doing food prep.

"haha no just washing, although sometimes people can get very specific with their dog's meals"

Said family also brought in their dog's food. This dog eats two raw chicken breasts, a raw egg and a large scoop of yogurt twice daily. They also brought in like a dozen raw drumsticks, I guess those are supposed to be treats I have no ****ing idea. We have a two foot high wall of chicken stacked in the fridge. God help us all.

Yogurt twice daily? I am surprised that dog does not have constant raging diarrhea (or perhaps he does and y'all are about to find out!).
 
So I work at a kennel now. Today a first-time-here family brought their dog in, as you do, and wanted a quick tour of the place to see how their furry friend will be living for the next week and a half ish. They happened to pass by the kitchen as I was washing food bowls, and the mother asked if I was the kennel chef doing food prep.

"haha no just washing, although sometimes people can get very specific with their dog's meals"

Said family also brought in their dog's food. This dog eats two raw chicken breasts, a raw egg and a large scoop of yogurt twice daily. They also brought in like a dozen raw drumsticks, I guess those are supposed to be treats I have no ****ing idea. We have a two foot high wall of chicken stacked in the fridge. God help us all.
:lol:
 

Cpt. Nemo

The Wurst
Section Moderator
M&BWB
Yogurt twice daily? I am surprised that dog does not have constant raging diarrhea (or perhaps he does and y'all are about to find out!).
Probably not? Dogs can usually handle fat ok, especially younger ones like this. When I had a dog I'd occasionally give her cheese, or excess steak fat as treats or whatever and she was always fine. Not as part of a regular diet though.
:lol: :lol: :lol: How did I miss that post, holy crap

How big is this thing? Is it normal to overload dogs with yoghurt? Is this a fetish thing that even the owners are only subconsciously aware of? so many questions

It's a medium size female pitbull, IIRC. No, this **** ain't ****ing normal. This is just one of the most spoiled dogs of all time. People can get godamned silly with their pets. I *still* don't know when the hell we're supposed to give the pitbull the drumsticks, which we're probably just not going to do because bird bones are near the top of the list of things not to feed dogs because they can easily shatter like bone glass and get stuck in their throats.

Meal Correction: It's two eggs a meal. The dog eats 4 eggs a day. I don't think they brought enough eggs to last the whole stay, I'm not sure.
 
Last edited:

Nega-Brutus

Sergeant at Arms
A man rides a bike into a pharmacy.
In plains sight, he fills like a 120L bag with stolen goods.
Everybody including the security watches and records it on their drone phones.
A woman suggests police be called. The security shrugs.
The thief rides his bikes out of the pharmacy while the security makes the most halfhearted attempt to take them bag from him. Once.

If you can't see the problem, you are the problem.
How does this relate to anything
 
How does this relate to anything
I think this fits into the right-wing narrative "liberals are ruining the country, law and order NAO".
Though it seems the real problem are American litigation practices, but I'd defer to what lawyerly types have to say, particularly if they are lawyers and liberals.
 

eddiemccandless

Knight at Arms
WBNWVC
In that video in particular that was meant as a jab at the defund the police movement, and if you read the comments people who liked it are "totally not racist". So I can only assume that the suggested solution would be shooting the perpetrator on sight, but only if he is black.
 

Pentagathoos

Regular
Haha I had a thread deleted on the on topic board, I was suggesting that governers shouldn't gain weight when waiting in settlements because I used my wife as one and now she's morbidly obese.
 

DanAngleland

Grandmaster Knight
M&BWBWF&SNW
I didn't read your post properly the first time, so I was confused as to what you were talking about- it made sense when I realised you were talking about Bannerlord. Seems a strange reason for them to delete the thread!
 
Somewhat loosely related to the UEFA LGBT debate in funny pictures thread, I have some three weeks ago sent a request to the Commission regarding observations submitted by national governments (Poland, Netherlands, Hungary, Romania) in a 2018 homosexual-couple-case before the Court of Justice of the EU. Try to guess the one country that refused to grant access to these documents, citing protection of a legal advice :lol:
There, there, Hungary :ohdear:
 
Top Bottom