TEO'S RANGERS: WHO THE **** STOLE 40 PAGES FROM US?!!

Are airships cool?

  • Yes

    Votes: 3 16.7%
  • Yes

    Votes: 0 0.0%
  • Yes

    Votes: 6 33.3%
  • Yes

    Votes: 3 16.7%
  • Yes

    Votes: 6 33.3%

  • Total voters
    18
  • Poll closed .

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Delora Filth

Do you want to run this ship?
Marquis
It's just a general uncomfortableness around automata stemming from too many viewings of BSG, Terminator etc. Heightened by the alcohol and whatever Brom spiked the fizzywine wi. . . . .

*SCROOOOWWWWCH, BOOOOM!*

"BEEEEOWWWWW! BEEEEOWWWW! BEEEOWWWW! RED ALERT! RED ALERT! COLLISION WITH UNIDENTIFIED OBJECT! FULL EEZO CORE CONTAINMENT FAILURE IMMINENT!"

*KRAKABOOOOOOM!*

"ALERT! SEVERAL HULL BREACHES IN AFT SECTION! EMERGENCY FOREDECK EJECTION COMMENCING!"

What the ****e?!
 

Delora Filth

Do you want to run this ship?
Marquis
OK! I admit it, shouldn't have named her as I did. Is this really the time for whinging about it?
All but the emergency guidance systems and life support seems fried. I'm popping a stim to clear my head. Then I'll go into the Jeffries tube to check if I can reroute some auxiliary systems.
 

Cyborg Eastern European

Canis Mechanicus
Archduke
Whinging? I'm practically celebrating.
The supervisor of Mars OCF ows me a supercap now. Just in time, too. The Varangian might have to go out of commission. Structure's...****ed, really.

Anyway, I'll go see if we've got any backup scrubbers in the hold. Oxygen supply still won't last long but I don't think they have to strech it that far.
 

Delora Filth

Do you want to run this ship?
Marquis
And you didn't let me in on the action. Still grumpy. Know what you mean about the structural integrity. Something about that phase warp made parts of Balefire's superstructure . . . rubbery is the best word I can find.

What the ****. Auto-nav suddenly kicked in. Almost looks like it's powering up the emergency jump drive. But it couldn't possib. . .

*WAAAAOOOOOWWWWWWW KZZZZZZZZT!*

Great, it ****ing well auto-jumped! Luckily I managed to fire the emergency pulse beacon right before. . . . ah, ****.
 

Bromden

Archduke
'tis Bromden calling from... one of the storage rooms for engine spare parts, I think. I woke up to a loud bang a couple of minutes ago. I have a wild headache, there's no artificial gravity here, and a lot of empty bottles and various parts that must be from a pleasure droid are floating around in the room. And I think we just jumped. What the hell happened?
 

Delora Filth

Do you want to run this ship?
Marquis
Well, something hit us, ship launched the fore section (basically the bit we had the party in and some auxiliary storerooms etc.), then auto-jumped to some random location. Situation as of now is basically: We're dead afloat, have no idea where we are, have no telemetry or sensoral data, roughly 48 hours of life support left, and down to our last barrel of mead.
 

Bromden

Archduke
Oh damn. We've got to do something, I don't want to die sober! I'll try to float to the main engine hub, to see if any of them can be started again, or at least to squeeze some extra energy out.
 

Cyborg Eastern European

Canis Mechanicus
Archduke
There should be a tertiary reactor array somewhere between the main hall and the aft of the section. Anyone closer than me?
Found a few extra scrubbers, our Oxygen supply is now at 60 hours. Won't smell all that last for the last twenty, though.

Teofish said:
And you didn't let me in on the action. Still grumpy. Know what you mean about the structural integrity. Something about that phase warp made parts of Balefire's superstructure . . . rubbery is the best word I can find.

Hey, it's hard enough getting time for a single ship with all the rebuilding they're doing. ****ing trade fleets get all the attention nowadays.
Most of the issue is with combat damage. Thermal weapons are not nice. And the heavy use of jump drives far too big for it did not help with the issue.
 
Hey we could always bring out that auxiliary Distiller we have in the cargo hold, If we set it to maximum efficiency we could get a bit of Mahalcohol and be drunk by the time Life support kicks it in.
 

Delora Filth

Do you want to run this ship?
Marquis
Might as well give up the engine fixings. I'm tapped into the main on-ship intranet grid from the Jeffries tube and it's just ****ing dead. No way to fix with the spare parts available, even if we were to jury rig some form of adequate power supply. The emergency jump drive was designed as a one-shot measure to get the ship back to friendly turf if something happened. Apparently the techies ****ed up the calibration something fierce.

Si-A-erra. said:
Hey we could always bring out that auxiliary Distiller we have in the cargo hold, If we set it to maximum efficiency we could get a bit of Mahalcohol and be drunk by the time Life support kicks it in.
Yes! I ****ing love you right now! Please hurry.
 
Well, I've had a look at the distiller and turns out it needs quite a lot of power, and seeing as only the Life support is working right now I may need to tap into it, It will bring us down to 40 hours instead of 50, but **** it we'll be smashed. I also found a few beers while I was down there so I say we save them to cure the hangover, that way we can do it straight, no sleep.
Cyborg Eastern European said:
Wait...weren't we rather close to Khergit space?
Soon after we stopped being welcome there?


:shock: Isn't there an alcohol shortage in that system? we could trade! we give them some booze and they bring strippers!
 

Delora Filth

Do you want to run this ship?
Marquis
Cyborg Eastern European said:
Wait...weren't we rather close to Khergit space?
Soon after we stopped being welcome there?
****. Now I'm kinda hoping it took us to the other side of the galaxy. Got to the bridge through the tube system. Managed to shut down the lockdown and reactivate life-support here. If someone could find a way to reroute some power up here I could probably get short range sensors back up. Looking out the window I can at least verify we've been jumped to a planet, habitable no less, instead of just dead space. Some small comfort in that at least.

Si-A-erra. said:
Well, I've had a look at the distiller and turns out it needs quite a lot of power, and seeing as only the Life support is working right now I may need to tap into it, It will bring us down to 40 hours instead of 50, but **** it we'll be smashed. I also found a few beers while I was down there so I say we save them to cure the hangover, that way we can do it straight, no sleep.
Hold off on the distiller. But bring the beer.
 

Bromden

Archduke
The borderland Khergit worlds are actually mostly supportive to us. That is, if some Khan of a desolate rock won't decide that capturing us would earn him some reputation with the Great Khan.

I got into the engine hub, and managed to run a quick diagnose. The bad news is: the core got overheated and it was ejected by the safety protocol after the jump. We're not going anywhere. The good news is, I shut down all still running auxiliary systems of the jump drive, so we got some power, enough for 20 hours and the distiller.
 

Cyborg Eastern European

Canis Mechanicus
Archduke
Or we could check the armoury on deck five, run an emergency beacon as loud as possible then either trade with anyone willing to offer a ride or just board the mother****ers when they try to latch on.



We are worth more alive, right?
 

Delora Filth

Do you want to run this ship?
Marquis
Whatever Brom did it enabled me to squeeze some juice into the sensors. Couldn't get a fix on our exact location. But that planet down there's teeming with life. I'll try to bounce a hail down there. If they're indeed border Khergit we'll very likely be seeing one of the aforementioned scenarios soon enough. Hyp, can you get me an exact account of our available armaments? Sierra, get that distiller running.
 

LtSpearing

Sergeant Knight
M&BWBWF&SNW
Right, here's my yearly check-in to command.

Chief of scientific-and-random-inventions-with-little-to-no-purpose-at-all section reporting~

Well, it's been a fun time for the new year. We've now outfitted the ship android with something reminiscent with the fly ass telly they used in ST:TNG

android_smartphone.jpg

Not only that, but we've also put our top comp. sci. folks on it, and through the amount of blood, sweat, and enduring completely illegal-unless-your-in-space working conditions we provided them, they've finally come up with a code that will not only ensure there is always power being routed to the coffee machine no matter what eventuality happens to the ship, but also plays the Soprano's theme song 24/7 out of the bathroom stereo system (Male AND female!)

http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=YDDkCiUhHCc

And lastly~ We've finally figured out how the hell to resurrect Carl Sagan. It's been a pain in the ass, and in the end we've had to sacrifice about 3 hot dogs and a virgin to the machine spirits, BUT we've finally infused his corpse into some awesome space marine armor, which seems to have gotten him back up on his feet.

Emperor_Sagan.jpg

Righto so that's about it chaps. That's the yearly report for the Chief of scientific-and-random-inventions-with-little-to-no-purpose-at-all section.
 
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