Technology (Especially Printers) Hating Thread

[Arvenski]

My printer can spit out a page very quickly......but only after it thinks about it for a couple minutes. In other words, turn it on, push print, and take a snooze (it doesn't always do this, however). When it does actually get around to printing, however, it prints very quickly.

 

[romandude]

I'm trying to print off a picture and my printer is all like **** YOU ODY **** YOU AND EVERYTHING YOU STAND FOR. I'm pressing print, and nothing is happening. No mechanical clicking, no movement, no error messages. Nothing. Right back you printer.

 

[Kentucky 『 ＨＥＩＧＵＩ 』 James]

隐藏

 

[Dryvus]

Why the hell does everyone and their dog have a smartphone besides me...

I don't! I have a Samsung flip phone. It's a senile piece of ****. "Send message? Why yes, I will turn myself off instead of doing that! Making a call? Well you've made ten calls no problem since I went on strike last time, off to sleep I go! Not using me? Might as well reboot for no ****ing reason!"

It's taken incredible restraint not to hurl it at the hardest surface in range so so many times. When I do get another one, I'll indulge.

 

[Vermillion_Hawk]

Be the better man Dryvus. Save it until you can trade it in (if the plan allows it).

That being said I've contemplated an Office Space-style beatdown for many of my electronics. Mostly my goddamned HP printer.

 

[Dryvus]

Be the better man Dryvus. Save it until you can trade it in (if the plan allows it).

It... it doesn't DESERVE to be traded in! Its components are accursed and must be cast to the four winds.

 

[Varalir]

You all just suck at printing.

 

[Big_Mac]

 

[Arvenski]

So I go to print my schoolwork, only to find out that because I hadn't used the printer in a few minutes, it had gone into sleep mode. So I turn it on, and while my computer says that the printer has one page queued, the printer doesn't print it. So I tell it to print again. It doesn't do jack. So I restart it and try again. After thinking about it for a few seconds, it spits out one blank page (even though I've told it to print three times now, so it should print three pages). So I tell it to print again. It doesn't do jack **** again. Come on, you moron machine, just gimme the ****ing page already. 

 

[Tibertus]

I've had the same printer/scanner for over 8 years. It's never jammed, always works, and the ink cartridges last a while. Can't complain.

 

[Vermillion_Hawk]

I've had the same printer/scanner for over 8 years. It's never jammed, always works, and the ink cartridges last a while. Can't complain.

Then you've succeeded where Arthur failed and found the Holy Grail.

 

[Kentucky 『 ＨＥＩＧＵＩ 』 James]

I've had the same printer/scanner for over 8 years. It's never jammed, always works, and the ink cartridges last a while. Can't complain.

Trust this thread to bump as soon as my printer decides to detect jams that aren't there and just crash in general. I've unplugged the thing practically every time I've used it.

 

[Leifr Eiríksson]

We have an A2 printer in the office that jams on a regular basis, it's a ****ing nightmare.
I was alone in the office on Monday, it jammed on the first print job - such rage and fury flew from my fists onto the damnable thing. I lifted the lid, grabbed the roll of paper (A2) and ragged on it, pulled the entire roll out with the vehemence and tossed a few meters of paper into the corner of the room.

Fresh roll was put in.
Followed by the burning of paper in the skip outside.
**** you paper.

 

[Tibertus]

At work they bought a brand new printer a couple weeks ago. Very first print job it jammed. For some reason work printers just suck.

 

[Anthropoid]

I have had reasonably good luck with Brother MFC laser printer/scanners. I recommend them as a relatively hassle free brand and model. The one I have has both color scanning and fax included, but just black and white print. My wife is a web designer and has a quite nice color laser printer that is pretty swank.

Still, even 'good' printers give you headaches.

Latest: have the brother installed on the laptop. Don't use the laptop or even plug it in for a while. Suddenly the computer thinks the printer is "not installed;" it doesn't show up as a choice for what printer to send jobs to. So reinstall it . . .it says "You already have one of those installed" Grrrrr

 

[Splintert]

I despite Linux and anything that has anything to do with it.

That is all, good day.

 

[K-64]

So you despise a large portion of servers and smartphones?

 

[Splintert]

Especially.

 

[Anthropoid]

So you despise a large portion of servers and smartphones?

He said "despite" not despise. Meaning, he is exists no matter whether Linux.

The converse being "I think, therefore I MSWord."

I despite Linux and anything that has anything to do with it.

That is all, good day.

 

[Arvenski]

Enjoying listening to an Indiana Jones CD, go to skip one song with vocals which I don't need to listen to, and the CD player decides that it's not going to work after that. Son of a *****, why does something always have to be screwed up?