I think there are solid arguments to both sides of the debate, to be honest.
Most of Warband's equipment choice was an illusion, but it was something that was in the hands of players, allowing them to make their own decisions. Admittedly, I was always a big fan of just running around with throwing weapons and forgoing armour and a proper melee weapon to do that, and it was a lot of fun in a casual setting. In higher-level play though, most pieces of equipment were ignored, or at least that is my understanding of it.
On the other hand, the class system simply removes most of these non-choices and allows you to just jump in and play on a more level playing field. But at the same time, it does take away some of the fun of mixing and matching gear to suit your own playstyle.
I'm just thinking out loud here, but is it possible that a lot of this frustration actually stems from the lack of visual customisation? Like, being unable to show off your silly character face, or running around shirtless as a statement of your melee prowess, or just to pick what you think looks cool?