I almost went the same path as the OP when i installed the mod recently. But only almost.
See, when i started out everything killed me, i didnt got anywhere with my playstyle or my troops. Having high numbers of peasant troops really dont matter ****, when they die like flies to bandits. I was just running from anything, yes even forest bandits tore me a new one. I mean, freggin forest bandits!
So i set back for a minute and thought about it. Then i got back into the game with the following conclusions.
Troop quality matters much much more than in native, and the ladder of troops is way longer. So i figured i hire some mercs myself to watch my butt till i had devolped my char a bit. I needed money for that so i did a bit of my usual trading while running from enemies left and right. But the money was not good enough for my taste, i almost was in perill again but then i entered a tournament and won it.
Holy crap, when you win a tournament the first time in any given town you can make quite a tidy sum of money of the bets you place. That was enough to hire some muscle, buy some gear and get into the game proper.
And belive me, once you get over that first hunch and develop your crappy recruits into something more powerfull the mod really opens up and the difficulty is much more even than you would think.
And its much more rewarding when you can finally kill all those pesky bandit/merc parties that litter the map, belive me.
I also learned that equipment is very important. The range of gear is pretty broad and what is maybe considere as top tier stuff in native can be considered middle ground in this mod. A lot of money is needed to get the good stuff but some freebies await as quest rewards and such. Also its worth to check the chest in Rivacheg, no more strange armor but something way better. Helped me a great deal.
In conclusion, this mod is very much a matter of taste but should not be tossed aside rigth away just because its difficult. If you stick with it you can have some great fun and awesome battles. Moreso if you know the native game in and out.
regards