playing as female - no war when rebelling

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I've been playing as a female lord, and I've noticed a couple major differences compared to Native, and I just wanted to check that the game was working as intended.  I'd much appreciate a veteran's input.

1) When I convince my husband that we should rebel against our king (with me as Queen), there is no automatic declaration of war from my former king.  Basically, I can leave my former kingdom peacefully with all our lands.  All I get is a "provocation" and a -40 relations with the former kingdom.  Is that right?  If so, that's a big change which makes starting a kingdom as a female much easier.

2) No feasts as a female?  Again, I see no option to ask my husband to do a feast.  Is this right?

Many thanks in advance!


Knight at Arms
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On 2), there were apparently some glitches that could result, so the VC devs disabled female pc feasts. You can find the details in some old bug reports threads here.

In terms of dealing with the lack of feasts, Lynxbuckler wrote a detailed account of how she handled that here: