You are seriously dense.
That they host their own server doesn't mean they provide that service to other people.
If TW accepts money to host servers they agree to deliver a service to that person, they need to provide tools to modify that server, TW is responsible for what happens on that server. If TW has downtime do they need to pay a refund? They need to provide customer support.
Hosting your own is a different cake than hosting for someone else.
I don't think anyone is expecting TW to open up a server for me and Steve, whenever we feel like playing on our own.
And perhaps there is some kind of issue with self-hosting from your own pc, perhaps to do with the siege Linux crashes or the resets after every game end.
But undoubtedly, TW is currently using dedicated servers to host the current multiplayer. The functionality is already there, there is already a method to alter gamemode/map/settings or there'd only be one gamemode.
So why hasn't that functionality which has existed for over a year, been made accessible to larger server hosting companies to set up and sell to individuals, just like warband?
It is now 2 months until release, we can say "it's EA" all we like, hopefully there will be a delay. Even if the delay was a full year, how long has it taken for other server changes to come into effect, like a dedicated duel mode? Or a ranked mode? How much longer until those are finished and tested? Then how much longer until custom servers then begin their testing? How long until they're finished? Will they hold full release until then?
There are alot of questions left hanging, I imagine because TW themselves hasn't got a solid answer to them either. But we haven't even been explicity told custom servers are a current priority, which incredibly might be the worst decision made so far, and there have been many bad decisions so far.
If this game releases without full custom server support, multiplayer is dead and buried. And we have no idea if that'll be the case.