'The Love Quest, or Sweetheart Search, is the ongoing, real-life saga of Christian Weston Chandler to obtain a girlfriend. The stated purpose of the Love Quest is to meet the person who will be his true love, solve all his problems and give birth to his children. However, Chris believes all of this will be assured upon his first successful sexual intercourse with a woman, and so for all practical purposes the true goal is to lose his virginity.
Chris is known to have had crushes on girls prior to 2002, but the Love Quest represents a focused effort to do everything in his power to achieve romantic fulfillment. He has often linked the Love Quest with what he claims to be visions from GodJesus commanding him to father a daughter, as well as his desire to prove that he is straight; at times these seem to be the only actual reasons Chris wants a lover.'
(it just gets so much better)
http://www.sonichu.com/cwcki/Love_Quest
On 29 March 2005 Chris (who had somehow regained full access to the mall) momentarily believed his prayers had been answered when he was approached by Hanna, a girl who worked at the local Starbucks. She invited Chris to have coffee with her. Chris quickly overreacted to this sudden reversal of fortune, calling his mother and showing Hanna his entire Sonichu scrapbook.
Anna McLerran later informed Chris that Hanna was simply trolling him for the lulz. In shock, Chris confronted Hanna and, when she admitted the truth, ran away screaming "NOOOOOOOOOO!", exactly like they do in movies. The entire incident was a crippling blow to Chris's self-esteem and the kind of thing that would be embarrassing for anyone. He also apparently made enough of a scene to get himself banned from the mall again'
Anna McLerran later informed Chris that Hanna was simply trolling him for the lulz. In shock, Chris confronted Hanna and, when she admitted the truth, ran away screaming "NOOOOOOOOOO!", exactly like they do in movies. The entire incident was a crippling blow to Chris's self-esteem and the kind of thing that would be embarrassing for anyone. He also apparently made enough of a scene to get himself banned from the mall again'
Aside from Megan's complete disinterest in romance with Chris, the relationship suffered other stumbling blocks, such as Megan's discomfort at Chris showering her with gifts; Megan's outrage over Chris's sexual harassment, hatred of men, and rampant homophobia; Megan's unwillingness to share a hypothetical hotel room with Chris; and Megan's discovery that Chris had to draw himself fingerbanging her to suppress his fantasies of assaulting and raping her. Even though she reacted as any normal human being would in the same situation, he was still shocked that she "broke up" with him and thought that all he had to do was say "I'm sorry" as much as possible.
