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I owned it. I want it back.

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I have no problem putting a ruler override on the ballot everytime.

I also have no problem that clans will leave when it’s used if they have no Fiefs of their or own, or even less then half the fiefs the ruler has (so grabbing a 4th instead of awarding someone a 2nd could push them away)
 
The game balances the fiefs... those with few or no fiefs go on the vote, as do those who own fiefs nearby. This is a good thing, as it helps your lords cluster their lands in defendable groups, and landless lords are more likely to leave your empire.

If you're not on the list, it means you have a fair number of fiefs yourself already. This isn't unprecedented either. Kingship evolved out of the principle of providing for those who support the king - sharing the spoils of war - slaves, treasure, land. Absolute leaders who kept everything and never distributed wealth pushed supporters away to others who did share. It was true of Rome, it was true of feudal Europe, Imperial China and it's true of dictatorships today.

Moral of the story is that sharing is good for your kingdom. Don't be so greedy.
The game shouldn't be arbitrarily balancing it for the player. The player ruler should absolutely be able to override the vassals and take any fief he wants. There should also be consequences if the player wants to play the tyrant. A greedy king should become very unpopular with his nobles, but it should be the player who makes that choice, not the game making it for him.
 
I pretty much agree with Irontoe. I also feel the ruler should have more fiefs than anyone else. That being said, I try to make sure that all my lords have at least one town and all but one clan has at least 3 total fiefs. All my clans have at least 1 town and 1/2 of them have at least 2.

Looking at it now, I have 12 clans in my kingdom. One has 2 fiefs, 3 have 3 fiefs, 4 have 4 fiefs, 1 with 5, 1 with 6, 1 with 7, and mine with 8. The one with 7 was Monchug's favorite before I became ruler. They weren't even an original Khuzait clan (either battanian or sturgian I think). The one with 2 fiefs I never see on the voting list, even though they are very active leading armies. Also, looking at it another way, I have 23 clan members with only 8 fiefs. I am currently short one companion so I could have 24 members to only 8 fiefs (1 fief for every 3 members). The next highest has 7 members with 4 fiefs (better than 1 for every 2). If you want to exclude companions, thats fine. I still have 15 family members with only 8 fiefs. Of the 11 other clans in my kingdom, 5 have more fiefs than members, 3 more have the same number of fiefs to members. Only 3 clans besides mine have more members than fiefs. 2 of these 3 are some of the newest clans to join and have worse than -50 relations with me because every time I take a holding and decide to be merciful they throw a fit and lose 10-20 relations with me.

So maybe others will look at it differently, but I feel I've been quite reasonable in assigning fiefs. Do I have the most holdings? Yes. Since I am the ruler should I have the most holdings? Yes. Do I lead the armies that take most of our holdings? Yes. Looking at the members-to-fiefs balance, you could say I've shorted myself substantially in the number of fiefs I've given my clan. Earth Dragon said he has no problem with clans leaving when they have no fiefs of their own. I agree with that statement which is why the first thing I do when I can get a clan to join us is to give them a castle (no, I don't give away my towns). All but one of my clans has at least one town and 3 total fiefs.

Personally, I think the voting for new fiefs should include any clan who:
--Is low on fiefs
--previously owned that fief
--has fiefs bordering that fief
--led the army that took that fief
--is ruler

The number of clans being voted on for a fief should vary. The voting should probably exclude clans from voting for their own clan. The voting page should include details on how many/which towns and castles the clan already has and should indicate why they are eligible to be voted to get the fief (which of the 5 reasons above).
 
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