[Adventure Net] Survival of the Fittest

正在查看此主题的用户

当前在线： 2 （会员： 0, 游客： 2）
You wonder how you ended up in such a ****ty, poorly-equipped dental office. Being a man of experience, you immediately divine the answer: this town is plagued by heroin addicts, the type of people who would gleefully ransack a poor, unassuming dentist's office for any quantity of precious metals left foolishly unsecured. This is also, you suspect, the reason why there is no proper lead shield to speak of. Each kilo of lead attracts a decent price when weighed-in for scrap.

Disillusioned with oral hygiene professionals, you ignore the persistent groaning at the door and peruse the supply of magazines in the rack in the waiting area. Perhaps finding a copy of Playboy will help cheer you up.

You don't find any Playboy, and surmise that the dentist's receptionist is probably a man-hating feminist. You do, however, find a fairly hefty copy of March 2019's Good Housekeeping. After checking the index for an entry on How to maintain your house during the event of a zombie-Apocalypse, and failing to find one, you roll the magazine around your left forearm and strap it in place using several elastic bands from the stationery-tidy on the reception counter.

Your left arm will now be safe from zombie bites. You suspect the magazine will also provide adequate protection against bites from dogs such as terriers, spaniels and labradors, but you wouldn't want to put it to the test against a German shepherd or a rottweiler.



Find magazine: success
Item gained: Magazine (impromptu arm-guard)
 
DO SAME THING FOR OTHER ARM. ALSO, REMEMBER THAT YOUR LISTENING IS LVL 10, SO TRY TO LISTEN AGAIN TO FIGURE OUT HOW MANY ZOMBIES APPROXIMATELY ARE IN FRONT OF THAT DOOR.

All dentists that I have ever been to, had those lead vests. Last time I've been to one was last year, so I don't think it's such an old-fashioned thing. But that also reminds me, that I should probably see a dentist in the nearby future again.
 
Pleased with your glossy housekeeping magazine arm-protector, you flip through the rack once more for something of equally good quality to use as a guard for your right arm. Just when you fear nothing is suitable, you find an old copy of "Beautiful Brides, 2016 edition". Using more elastic bands, you strap this to your right arm, taking care to position it in such a way to allow continued flexion in your wrist.

Satisfied with your progress so far, you stop by the front door and concentrate on the groaning outside. For several minutes you listen, trying to determine how many zombies are currently after your brain. You think to yourself, "If life were an RPG, I suspect my listening skills would be around level 10." Then you feel nerdy for having such thoughts. Good job the guys on your crew aren't here to hear you, you'd never live it down.

You still aren't sure how many zombies are outside the door, though.

You glance at a clock on the wall and notice it is now midday. Wow, where did the morning go? The fish in the aquarium are swimming around hungrily, and your stomach begins to rumble too. It's been almost 24 hours since you last ate.



Find additional magazine: success
Listening: failed

What my dentist has can be most accurately summed up as a lead collar. I get better upper body protection (granted, in the form of rubber, not lead) when I go to the hair salon :razz:
 
BE STUBBORN AND TRY LISTENING AGAIN. IF LISTENING FAILS, OPEN THE WINDOW, MAKE SURE NO ZOMBIES OUTSIDE ARE WAITING FOR YOU, DROP THE PILLOWS YOU HAVE CAREFULLY AND JUMP OUT OF THE WINDOW (WITH ALL THE LOOT YOU HAVE, NATURALLY).

IF LISTENING SUCCEEDS, DO THE FOLLOWING:

IF 3 OR LESS ZOMBIES, POSITION YOURSELF STRATEGICALLY, HAVE YOUR METAL WEAPON IN THE RIGHT HAND AND THE SCALPEL IN THE LEFT. OPEN THE DOOR WITH YOUR LEFT HAND, ROUNDHOUSE-KICK THE FIRST ZOMBIE ON THE HEAD (IDEALLY SMASHING HIS SKULL TO PULP), THEN SWING YOUR METAL WEAPON RIGHT AT THE HEAD OF THE SECOND ZOMBIE (IDEALLY SMASHING HIS SKULL TO PULP) AND PROCEDE TO DO ONE OF THE TWO PREVIOUS ACTIONS ON THE THIRD ZOMBIE. KEEP SCALPEL AS AN EMERGENCY WEAPON AT HAND IF ONE OF THOSE ****ERS GETS TOO CLOSE.

IF 4 OR MORE ZOMBIES, PROCEED TO THE WINDOW AS DESCRIBED ABOVE.
 
Pretty sure a broken leg isn't the right way to go at this thing. A conveniently placed downspout could ease our climbing. Or looking for enough trips of clothing/textile sheets to tie a rope. Both are viable in reality. Downspouts have a tendency to fall down with you though.
 
Your nickname back in the Fire Station was "the mule." Not because you're hung like a horse, but because you're stubborn like a donkey. Determined to try listening at the door again, you crouch in silence for several minutes whilst an unknown quantity of undead persons continue to profess their monosyllabic desire for what lies between your ears.

Miraculously, your stubbornness pays off. Not only do you determine that there is only one zombie outside the front door, you also feel as if you're better able to listen to things in future.

A single zombie. You should be able to take him, easy. Right? At least, it looks pretty damn easy in all those zombie movies. Admittedly, you haven't watched very many, preferring instead the upbeat messages often imparted by romcoms. But if Simon Pegg can do this, so can you!

Steel pole in your right hand, scalpel in your left, you fling aside the filing cabinet, open the door, and clad in your sparkling white dentist's coat and face mask, yell, "Heeeeeere's Biggie!"

The zombie is prepared, and strikes at you before you can attempt your first kick. Your first instinct is to dodge, but with you and the zombie crowding the door, it's pretty tight, and you struggle to move in time. You raise your left arm, hoping to block the zombie's strike with your improvised arm guard, but the zombie then strikes out with its other hand instead. Desperately you raise the steel pipe and use the momentum to deflect the incoming blow.

You try to raise the pipe but the zombie is inside your personal space, and you can't get enough impetus to make a proper swing. Instead you slash out with the scalpel, and the zombie falls to the ground.

Once it's down you set upon it with the pipe, bashing its head into a pulp. Only when the corpse ceases twitching do you stop to take several deep breaths. Surprised that there is so little blood, your thoughts turn once more to the oddness of this situation. Was this zombie a living person yesterday, who had somehow become infected and turned into this monstrosity? Or it had long been a corpse, animated by some unholy force? If the dead were rising, then what had happened to all the living?

It is a question to consider for later. Though your spirits are buoyed by your first victory, and your vanquished opponent lies dead (again) at your feet, you know that today your skill and luck have both worked in your favour. The next time you encounter these fiends, you need to be better prepared.



Listening: critical success  :facepalm:
Permanent +1 increase to Listening
Initiative: failed
Dodge: failed
Block: failed
Parry/Deflect: success
RH attack: failed
LH attack: success
Existential pondering: minimal
 
PITY THE ZOMBIE AND THEN CAREFULLY CHECK WHAT LIES BEYOND THE DOOR/IN THE HALLWAY OR WHATEVER IS THERE.

ALSO, SELF HIGH-FIVE.
 
Hell, ****ing yeah!!! We're awesome. Critical success. Hell, yeah!!! That's the Biggie way of life, better get used to it!!!

TEABAG DEAD ZOMBIE  :iamamoron:  :party:
 
You spend a moment feeling sorry for the poor dead soul whose head you just caved in. Then you remember it was trying to eat your brain, and the moment of sympathy flees like Bambi in front of a shotgun.

Looking around, you find yourself outside, on the street. Although it's a warm, sunny day, unsettled dark clouds have for the past couple of hours been rolling into town, and you reckon it will only be another hour or so before the sky is completely grey. Five concrete steps lead back up to the door of the dentist's office. The street slopes away a little to your left, and there are a couple more buildings that way, in front of what looks like a park/playground. You can just about see the bars of a jungle gym through the trees.

Across the road are an assortment of shops.

To the right is a small block of apartments, and further up the road is the town hall. From down here you can no longer see the bell tower of the school nor the church steeple, but you think you can guestimate their general direction from the view you had from the window in the dentist's surgery.

Remembering that the Right To Loot is now yours, you pat the zombie down, feeling in its pockets for anything that might be useful. You find nothing, and the smell of dead flesh makes you want to gag. Real Life, it turns out, is much more disgusting than Call of Duty.

Your sense of teenage mischief kicks in, and you roll the zombie onto its back, unzip your pants, and hover over the zombie's mouth. Then you remember that you smashed the zombie's head into a fruity-pulp; all that remains is cracked bone, mangled rotting flesh, and oozy grey fluid which you guess to be brain matter.

Resisting the urge to vomit at the thought of the viscera soup which you almost dipped your dangling unmentionables into, you stand up, put away your crown jewels, and step away from the putrid corpse.



Items on zombie: none
 
I thought the dentist's office was on the second floor and now we're already on street level? Ah well...

CHECK OUT SHOPS ON THE OTHER SIDE OF THE STREET, BUT PROCEED CAREFULLY, ALWAYS LOOKING AROUND FOR OTHER SURVIVORS OR ZOMBIES. PREPARE MENTALLY FOR A SPONTANEOUS ROUNDHOUSE-KICK AND HOLD ON TIGHT TO YOUR MELEE WEAPON.

CHECK OUT THE SHOPS FOR THE FOLLOWING THINGS:

- LARGE BAGPACK
- FOOD & DRINK
- STUFF TO MAKE FIRE WITH
- WEAPONS OR STUFF THAT COULD BE TURNED INTO A WEAPON
- FIRST AID EQUIPMENT
- PR0N MAGAZINES
- STUFF THAT COULD BE USED AS BODY ARMOR (LOOK IN SPORTS SHOP FOR AN ICEHOCKEY KEEPER'S BODY PROTECTION OR SOMETHING ALONG THOSE LINES)

REPORT ON OTHER INTERESTING SHOPS WE MIGHT ENCOUNTER. ALSO, TRY TO THINK BACK OF WHERE YOU WERE ACTUALLY PLANNING TO GO LAST NIGHT. DO WE STILL HAVE FAMILY LEFT THAT WE WANT TO MEET UP WITH? PONDER TAKING OVER THIS TOWN AND CLAIMING IT FOR YOURSELF: "BIG MCLARGE-HUGE TOWN" SOUNDS PRETTY AWESOME, EVEN IF YOU SAY SO YOURSELF.
 
Your mind boggles. From the surgery window you were looking out from the second floor. Now you've stepped out of the front door and you're on street level! What is happening? Have the laws of physics somehow been suspended? Have you stepped into some twisted remake of Labyrinth? Is David Bowie going to show up with a goblin horde, to tempt you over to the dark side?

Standing over the corpse of the zombie, you start to lose your mental grip on reality as up becomes down, left becomes right, and inside becomes out.

zYSnI.jpg

No wait, false alarm. It turns out you're just not a particularly spatially aware individual.



Orders will be handled when I get home tonight and have access to my dice.
 
If you read up Corndawg's Adventure Net, you'll notice plenty of descriptions. Most of them include her flashing her rear....aaah....good times  :party:
 
That looks more like you, but why not. Gotta ask Untitled whether that's gonna "do the job", if you catch my drift  :shifty:
 
您必须登录或注册才可回复。

类似的主题

In Progress Can't tell which of my troops of a type have survived and which have died
回复
10
查看
152
Q. Velanor Lycanus
Need More Info 1.2 beta: Final surviving faction immediately/constantly offers 2-3m denars in tribute after second to last is destroyed.
回复
3
查看
82
MArdA TaleWorlds
MArdA TaleWorlds
Promote Troops and upgrading them to Companion for richer role playing
回复
8
查看
181
archaicwarrior
archaicwarrior
后退
顶部 底部