Absurd Conspiracy Thread (Alex Jones Approved)

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Nymeris 说:
Yeah I've investigated that too. People saw that Armagan gained weight in the interviews and just laughed about it, but have anyone heard about Frank these days? He ATE HIM, there is no question, our frank is gone boys.

Rather Armagan and not me. Ginger makes me cough.
 
Triune Impurity Rites 999 说:
Nymeris 说:
Yeah I've investigated that too. People saw that Armagan gained weight in the interviews and just laughed about it, but have anyone heard about Frank these days? He ATE HIM, there is no question, our frank is gone boys. He knew everything about the game, the development time, the earth flatness, the carnivorous addiction of the leader, man I pray for those interns over there, my theory, is that it's a plan to keep us BLIND about the TRUTH, development will never stop, so interns go there but to their own GRAVE and all those DLC and developer blogs are to keep us home forever, so we don't go beyond the earth borders!!!!! Stop these sick filths!!!! The earth is flat!!

You, sir, are 112% Awake. Do you have a YouTube channel?
Yes I do, but it's not conspiracy related at all
 
KhergitLancer80 说:
Who was the community manager before Frank ?
No one: Frank was the first. Armagan probably did the work that Frank/Callum did before TW appointed a Community Manager.
 
KhergitLancer80 说:
Maybe some of the forum users in here are devs ?
Yea that was a weak one.
This one actually may be possible, I mean @RainbowDash it's pretty obvious dude get out of the Dev closet
 
Nymeris 说:
KhergitLancer80 说:
Maybe some of the forum users in here are devs ?
Yea that was a weak one.
This one actually may be possible, I mean @RainbowDash it's pretty obvious dude get out of the Dev closet

It all makes sense now! Or does it? I'm confused.
 
Actually it was an American named Jazzy or Yazzy working at taleworlds that did some community stuff on the side without it being his job. He ended up having to leave the company, though the reasons are not known officially/publically.

For those who love conspiracy theories, he was hired by Fatshark to help develop the ****ty game called War of the Roses. The very same game that Callum (The current Community Manager) also worked for in the past :eek:
 
Nymeris 说:
Yes I do, but it's not conspiracy related at all


Dude, that is the best video I have ever seen on youtube. 4 hours of sitting and smiling, who can beat that? Oh wait, TW can because they've put flouride in our water, so much for next dimensional experiential compression. Goodbye exploring existence and hello Vampiric Archon Mind manifesting as Jupiter channeling our chakras through our silicon moon, feeding upon our worship and our infinite eternal sacred energies. Hello knocks on the door at midnight and black bags to nameless trains delivering us like cattle to FEMA concentration camps to be piled into gas chambers to make way for the NWO.
 
MaHuD 说:
Actually it was an American named Jazzy or Yazzy working at taleworlds that did some community stuff on the side without it being his job. He ended up having to leave the company, though the reasons are not known officially/publically.

For those who love conspiracy theories, he was hired by Fatshark to help develop the **** game called War of the Roses. The very same game that Callum (The current Community Manager) also worked for in the past :eek:
Oh god, and I've blamed our dear Armagan. Guys, Fatsharks has take on control of Taleworlds, Callum is the headmaster of all this, he ate Frank!!! Who else but him. We are near the truth guys, watch your asses. I'm going into hiding after posting this.

Triune Impurity Rites 999 说:
Dude, that is the best video I have ever seen on youtube. 4 hours of sitting and smiling, who can beat that? Oh wait, TW can because they've put flouride in our water, so much for next dimensional experiential compression. Goodbye exploring existence and hello Vampiric Archon Mind manifesting as Jupiter channeling our chakras through our silicon moon, feeding upon our worship and our infinite eternal sacred energies. Hello knocks on the door at midnight and black bags to nameless trains delivering us like cattle to FEMA concentration camps to be piled into gas chambers to make way for the NWO.
Holy **** this got so dark I love it
 
Gibbylimmer 说:
Arnulf Floyd 说:
I not believe in conspiracy theories, TW works too slowly and calm for release a game in a decade. We were not obliged to wait years for a game, we can play othee games and we can do other things
TaleWorlds is obviously taking such a long time just to make the warband veterans give up hope, and sell more to kids.

That's the short version.  The more detailed truth is that Taleworlds wants to develop a totally new game that will appeal to the endless masses of non-gamers, and sell over 4 billion copies, except that the old veteran M&B fans would bad-mouth the game and ruin sales.  The plan is to drive all of the veteran M&B players away, or simply wait until they die of old age waiting, before unveiling the game to end all games, geared for the comprehension and attention span of about a 4 year old.

The fact that they've got government support (not enough to fully finance the delay, but enough to stretch things out a few years) indicates that the game will probably have a strong Turkish bias, playing them up as the heroic good guys saving the world from destruction.
 
Honved 说:
The fact that they've got government support (not enough to fully finance the delay, but enough to stretch things out a few years) indicates that the game will probably have a strong Turkish bias, playing them up as the heroic good guys saving the world from destruction.

Wow, so Bannerlord is going for realism...
 
Rungsted93 说:
zlocish 说:
There are some people who said that the development of Bannerlord takes so long because of the fact that turkish government is financing the game. Basically, they say that because they can get all the money they want for the time of development, they won't relase the game for years to come.

I don't think that's true... However them being funded has resulted in them not being in a situation where they've needed to rush out the game. I think however for a long time they had doubts about what was actually going to be in the game in terms of features etc. Also I do have a theory that they wanted for a long time to have co-op campaign and it has caused them quite the troubles.
the game is long past "being rushed" at this time mate... In fact they are delaying it, not rushing it nor doing it within reasonable time-frame.

I'd say that this is problematic, not a good thing. Lack of deadlines lead to loops in any area. Films (I'd know I work with those), games (I'd know, I'm an undergraduate in Game Design / Development), music (I've had bands in the past, so I've seen it too), manufactured goods (there's always something that can be fixed), design in general (there's always room for improvement, and designers tastes shift during development, I have a sister who's a graphical designer, and I've also seen it with my own effing eyes). At any rate, pick a profession and this will be true to all of them. That doesn't take away the blame from some publishers for being culprits on ruining products due to their stupidity when imposing deadlines, making it the best choice to have a balance and compromise with time-frames, but not complete lack there of...

So, TW is working as an amateur startup for their second game, no surprise, they've only really have a single game under their belt, they are not part of the mainstream league of international game developers, and they are without any sort of publishers. Add to it the government funding with a lack of any time-frame constraint, and there you have it: Room for eternal development. I wouldn't mind their lack of professionalism if they were not promising releases year after year with nothing to show for, even the dev-blogs are laughable, although it's better than nothing (before Callum there was nothing at all). So, if they would keep to themselves and not say anything, I wouldn't care, but their "marketing" stunts have grown old fast and they are exceptionally annoying for any old-timer fans of their original game. In fact, people from my time usually are not seeing in the forums anymore, with a few exceptions of which are the people who actually endorse their behavior, anyone else outside of their mentality club is like me and keeps realistically complaining about it. New-comers are fresh meat, they'll be hyped for a couple years and then they'll either vanish (like most), become like me, or join the positivity club boot-licking the delay as if it were linked to good results (which is never really true, it's a lie people tell themselves).

I'd say that there are no conspiracies, but then again, anything that helps them to be neglectful or indolent does in fact feed this insurmountable amount of development time...

PS: I have a friend who made a game alone in less time than BL, and he was alone... From coding, to modeling, to UI... He only got a team in last 2 years of development, which consisted of 4 people beside him...
 
Can't tell if that last post was a conspiracy or something. I guess your friend has also all the pressure from their fans from the previous game they made, also all the recommendations, all the exigencies and all the work like, making a whole new engine for their game over their heads too, so you can compare both games.
I was going to make this thread discussion lacking so people could relax and just talk stupid stuff to have fun but damn man you broke my post.
 
I'm not normally one for conspiracies but recently a friend of mine has been trying to convince me that Taleworlds is simultaneously working on another game which they will release it alongside Bannerlord. I not entirely convinced that this is false though I remain highly doubtful that this is true.
 
Nymeris 说:
Can't tell if that last post was a conspiracy or something. I guess your friend has also all the pressure from their fans from the previous game they made, also all the recommendations, all the exigencies and all the work like, making a whole new engine for their game over their heads too, so you can compare both games.
I was going to make this thread discussion lacking so people could relax and just talk stupid stuff to have fun but damn man you broke my post.

That's because even though conspiracy theories about TW might be funny (I agree on that wholeheartedly) there's some bottom of truth to some of them, not as conspiracies, mind you, but as reasons why things aren't going as smoothly as they should. Since I'm kind of exhausted of TW (which by the way it affects me is proof enough that I am a fan, no doubt) and it's marketing stunts, I've became kind of bitter. At any rate, I'll give life to the topic again with the most bizarre and well constructed conspiracy I can make! hahaha But I'll need some time to cool off my head though! Be back in a few days hahah :wink:
 
xdj1nn 说:
That's because even though conspiracy theories about TW might be funny (I agree on that wholeheartedly) there's some bottom of truth to some of them, not as conspiracies

I knew it, TW is a physical manifestation of the Vampiric Archon Mind polluting our public water with fluoride to calcify our paneal glands to prevent us from astral projection and realizing our destinies lie in dimensional compression and not holy exaltation!
 
Triune Impurity Rites 999 说:
xdj1nn 说:
That's because even though conspiracy theories about TW might be funny (I agree on that wholeheartedly) there's some bottom of truth to some of them, not as conspiracies

I knew it, TW is a physical manifestation of the Vampiric Archon Mind polluting our public water with fluoride to calcify our paneal glands to prevent us from astral projection and realizing our destinies lie in dimensional compression and not holy exaltation!
Truth, I've never seen them on mirrors, I'm 100% they are all Lasombra practicing Abyss Mysticism!
 
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