Sorry Killer, but I agree with him. He even takes glitches and bugs and stuff that wouldn't have happened and made them funny.
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Whatever.
The best in my humble opinion.
The best in my humble opinion.
mrstabindaface
Recruit
killer110 说:I only called him a blasphemer because he treated his opinion as fact.
I'm pretty sure its fact, undeniable indisputible fact.
Anyhow does the new title mean that connor might make his own kingdom, or do what i'm doing with one of my characters in having his own personal war with those horse riding bastards.
MatthaisRagnarsson
Governing isn't something Connor is interested in or good at. If you notice his stats, you'll notice most points have gone into fighting skills. I don't think I have any in leadership at all, and CHA is his lowest stat. He does, however, have a vendetta against Urumada Noyan, though he believes him dead. I haven't decided what to do about the Khergits yet, I think for now, I'll stay neutral towards them to make rescues and that sort of thing easier. Anywho, onto the next episode...
Chapter 11
The North, as of Chapter 11
June 24, 1257
I came to Veluca shortly before sunset, and decided to spend the night there. It's still controlled by the Swadians, who, I must say, completely exceeded me expectations for them. Delinard apparently managed to pull his head out of his arse, because they also control Curaw and Narra. From what I hear, the Vaegir have now besieged Khudan, hoping to get to it before the Swadians do, I guess. The Sarranids still besiege Halmar, and I won't be surprised if the Swadians and Sarranids end up in a war for the steppes. I also bet the Nords will move on the weakened Vaegir to take full control of the north.
June 25th
Me trusty shield was gettin' fairly battered, so I traded it in for a better one, a brand new heavy heater shield before leavin' Veluca. When next I stop, it'll be on the Rhodok coast!
Let the debauchery begin!
'Tis a lovely town...
Saw a very well-crafted bastard sword that set me to droolin'...but t'was just outside me price range. I did, however, managed to buy a slightly more powerful bow. Now to return to Nancy's and pick up where I left off.
Me greatest love...
So I get to the bar and see me old friend Timmy the Bard. We bought each other's drinks and got to talkin' about women again...he gave me some pickup lines to use on the wenches at the back table, which, had I not been drinking, would know where a bad idea...ended up getting a tankard over the head for me stupidity. Of course, I got Timmy back. I get staring at him and grinning as he drank, makin' him think I put something in his wine when he wasn't looking. I didn't, of course, but it was funny watching him run outside to throw up. Were Rolf here, he actually would've defecated in Timmy's mug.
Drinkin' with Timmy.
Either way, we patched things up with more booze.
June 26th
The next morning, I heard that the Vaegir and the Khan had finally made peace, which is stupid for the Vaegir, because they probably coulda waited until they'd retaken Khudan. I guess they were tired o' fighting, and the Khergit were quick to offer, seeing as how they're getting thrashed from the Swadians and the Sarranids.
After recoverin' sufficiently from me hangover, I decided to head to the arena to show these Rhodoks how to fight.
Got knocked out in me first go, but only after taking three of them with me. The second go, started doin' great but two underhanded twits manage to sneak up on me. I awoke to hear...
"HEY STEFAN!"
"HEY VLAD!"
"WE'S KNOCKEDS OUTS OURS BOSS!"
"YEAYAH!"
"WE'S DE HEROES!"
I'm doin' well!
I'm doin' not so well!
I managed to take 'em out in the next fight, though, for which the rest of the fighters thanked me for. These Rhodoks are pretty tough, I'll give 'em that...after four rounds I was ready to call it quits. Had a couple of pretty Rhodok girls there, though, who were pretty impressed with me skills and wanted to come back to the inn with me to...ahhh...treat me wounds, heheheheh....
Stefan and Vlad, try takin' me out
Which didn't work out so well, now that I was prepared.
When I went downstairs for dinner, feeling better than I have in ages, the town goons...I mean guards, were waitin' for me. They said the Count needed to see me, and quickly escorted me to the castle. Fortunately, I wasn't hanged. Count Gutlans, it turns out, heard I was in town and wanted to hire me to hunt down a murderer by the name o' Euscarl Bright.
The Count's mission
I accepted, knowing I'd be bored with this town in a few days, despite the exceptionally good ale and the beautiful women. I stayed around for two more days, drinking, wenching, and listening to Timmy's act. On June 28th, I headed to Dirigisene, were Euscarl was rumored to be hidin' amongst some relatives.
Dirigisene...your average, everyday village...next door to a bandit lair. The fact that this place isn't burned to the ground should make anyone suspicious. No doubt, askin' around for Euscarl will only get me a knife in the back. I'll need to do this quickly. I crept around the side of the village, not using the main road, and managed to get in without bein' spotted. Found the shifty-eyed little snot hidin' behind a house, biting his nails and fingering his sword.
Sneakin' into Dirigisene
Me quarry
I told him to come along peacably, but he insisted on making me work for me money. I was only too happy to oblige. He came at me, and I parried his cut, then he started backing up, apparently not seeing the bow at me side. I quickly dropped me sword and knocked an arrow to the string. He charged again, and I put one right in his eye.
Euscarl's attack
'Twas a damned good shot, don't ye think?
Within seconds I beheaded him, and rode away on Fred before the bandits even knew I was there. Ran into Gutlans on the way back to Yalen, to whom I traded a severed head for 300 denars. Good trade, if you ask me, at least on my part.
I used some of that money to get drunk again, and, from what people tell me, I stood outside of Nancy's, dancing and then swinging me sword and yelling things about how Gary Busey was eating my brain. Which, for all I know, is true.
Doin' a little dance...
HELP! GARY BUSEY'S EATING MY BRAIN!
June 29th
After a bit o' plotting, I decided to go and ransack the bandit lair I'd found near Dirigisene. With some careful archery and use o' terrain, I figured I could take 'em out all on me lonesome. Besides, I wouldn't have to split the treasure with anyone.
The fools had made their camp in a narrow valley, between two cliffs, one of which I waited atop for them to make the climb with their bloody big hammers. Two I was able to turn into pincushions early on. I quickly ran to the other cliff in order to get better shots on the rest of the blaggards. The majority chose to wait, waving their huge hammers around like a drunken pervert with his penis. One, braver or dumber than the rest, marched up the hill with his over-sized butcher knife while I waited patiently, sending back down with one I daresay flawless stroke o' me blade. I began to taunt the rest about their sexual preferences.
The Lair
Sharpshooting
Takin' the high ground
Behold, the last act of a twit.
I rest me case.
Three of them made their way up the cliff, and two I took out with me arrows, and wounded the other before cutting him down for good with me sword. Another pair hurled rocks at me, none of which hit. Needless to say, I educated them on the merits of archery over rock-hurling.
Isn't that quaint, he thinks that shield will protect him!
Takin' aim...
A second from death
Two others, who I presumed to be the leaders (due, no doubt, to being the dumbest and smelliest), still awaited patiently, not even attempting to take cover or bring out their shields. I had only 10 arrows left, at this point, but I took 'em down to be sure. Unfortunately, while I was busy concentrating on the dummies, half-a-dozen more damn near got the drop on me. I drew me sword and the real fight began. Two of them, I noticed, were the resident pointy-object flingers, and I quickly dodged their projectiles while another three came at me, swords in hand. I slew them and managed to get back aways, determined to make me last two arrows count. I put one in another of the bandits, and me last missed.
The morons charge!
He's brave, at least.
STOP! HAMMER TIME!
Another two bandits came at me, one with hammer, the other with sword and shield. The swordsman managed to wound me, using his companion as a sacrificial lamb, but in the end, he fell like the others. I chased the survivors down into the valley, which was probably a mistake on me part, but I was drunk with blood by that point and Busey kept chanting "KILL! KILL! KILL!" so what was I to do?
Go ahead, Knave...make my day!
Victory
I eviscerated them and, and Busey painted "BUSEY WUZ HERE!" On their shack with their own blood whilst I looted the place...I took Iron, wool, furs, and oil, which would catch me a good bit in Yalen, enough to buy me a better sword...I made the weaponsmith promise to give me old one a good home as I said a tearful goodbye. I was sad until I tested the new one...it was more balanced than me previous weapon, easier to wield. May it smite many a foe!
Ain't she pretty?
Also, when I got back, I heard that the Vaegir had declared war on the Swadians. Undoubtedly, Yaroface wants Curaw back. I wonder if I should get involved...Nah!
Chapter 11
June 24, 1257
I came to Veluca shortly before sunset, and decided to spend the night there. It's still controlled by the Swadians, who, I must say, completely exceeded me expectations for them. Delinard apparently managed to pull his head out of his arse, because they also control Curaw and Narra. From what I hear, the Vaegir have now besieged Khudan, hoping to get to it before the Swadians do, I guess. The Sarranids still besiege Halmar, and I won't be surprised if the Swadians and Sarranids end up in a war for the steppes. I also bet the Nords will move on the weakened Vaegir to take full control of the north.
June 25th
Me trusty shield was gettin' fairly battered, so I traded it in for a better one, a brand new heavy heater shield before leavin' Veluca. When next I stop, it'll be on the Rhodok coast!
Saw a very well-crafted bastard sword that set me to droolin'...but t'was just outside me price range. I did, however, managed to buy a slightly more powerful bow. Now to return to Nancy's and pick up where I left off.
So I get to the bar and see me old friend Timmy the Bard. We bought each other's drinks and got to talkin' about women again...he gave me some pickup lines to use on the wenches at the back table, which, had I not been drinking, would know where a bad idea...ended up getting a tankard over the head for me stupidity. Of course, I got Timmy back. I get staring at him and grinning as he drank, makin' him think I put something in his wine when he wasn't looking. I didn't, of course, but it was funny watching him run outside to throw up. Were Rolf here, he actually would've defecated in Timmy's mug.
Either way, we patched things up with more booze.
June 26th
The next morning, I heard that the Vaegir and the Khan had finally made peace, which is stupid for the Vaegir, because they probably coulda waited until they'd retaken Khudan. I guess they were tired o' fighting, and the Khergit were quick to offer, seeing as how they're getting thrashed from the Swadians and the Sarranids.
After recoverin' sufficiently from me hangover, I decided to head to the arena to show these Rhodoks how to fight.
Got knocked out in me first go, but only after taking three of them with me. The second go, started doin' great but two underhanded twits manage to sneak up on me. I awoke to hear...
"HEY STEFAN!"
"HEY VLAD!"
"WE'S KNOCKEDS OUTS OURS BOSS!"
"YEAYAH!"
"WE'S DE HEROES!"
I managed to take 'em out in the next fight, though, for which the rest of the fighters thanked me for. These Rhodoks are pretty tough, I'll give 'em that...after four rounds I was ready to call it quits. Had a couple of pretty Rhodok girls there, though, who were pretty impressed with me skills and wanted to come back to the inn with me to...ahhh...treat me wounds, heheheheh....
When I went downstairs for dinner, feeling better than I have in ages, the town goons...I mean guards, were waitin' for me. They said the Count needed to see me, and quickly escorted me to the castle. Fortunately, I wasn't hanged. Count Gutlans, it turns out, heard I was in town and wanted to hire me to hunt down a murderer by the name o' Euscarl Bright.
I accepted, knowing I'd be bored with this town in a few days, despite the exceptionally good ale and the beautiful women. I stayed around for two more days, drinking, wenching, and listening to Timmy's act. On June 28th, I headed to Dirigisene, were Euscarl was rumored to be hidin' amongst some relatives.
Dirigisene...your average, everyday village...next door to a bandit lair. The fact that this place isn't burned to the ground should make anyone suspicious. No doubt, askin' around for Euscarl will only get me a knife in the back. I'll need to do this quickly. I crept around the side of the village, not using the main road, and managed to get in without bein' spotted. Found the shifty-eyed little snot hidin' behind a house, biting his nails and fingering his sword.
I told him to come along peacably, but he insisted on making me work for me money. I was only too happy to oblige. He came at me, and I parried his cut, then he started backing up, apparently not seeing the bow at me side. I quickly dropped me sword and knocked an arrow to the string. He charged again, and I put one right in his eye.
Within seconds I beheaded him, and rode away on Fred before the bandits even knew I was there. Ran into Gutlans on the way back to Yalen, to whom I traded a severed head for 300 denars. Good trade, if you ask me, at least on my part.
I used some of that money to get drunk again, and, from what people tell me, I stood outside of Nancy's, dancing and then swinging me sword and yelling things about how Gary Busey was eating my brain. Which, for all I know, is true.
June 29th
After a bit o' plotting, I decided to go and ransack the bandit lair I'd found near Dirigisene. With some careful archery and use o' terrain, I figured I could take 'em out all on me lonesome. Besides, I wouldn't have to split the treasure with anyone.
The fools had made their camp in a narrow valley, between two cliffs, one of which I waited atop for them to make the climb with their bloody big hammers. Two I was able to turn into pincushions early on. I quickly ran to the other cliff in order to get better shots on the rest of the blaggards. The majority chose to wait, waving their huge hammers around like a drunken pervert with his penis. One, braver or dumber than the rest, marched up the hill with his over-sized butcher knife while I waited patiently, sending back down with one I daresay flawless stroke o' me blade. I began to taunt the rest about their sexual preferences.
Three of them made their way up the cliff, and two I took out with me arrows, and wounded the other before cutting him down for good with me sword. Another pair hurled rocks at me, none of which hit. Needless to say, I educated them on the merits of archery over rock-hurling.
Two others, who I presumed to be the leaders (due, no doubt, to being the dumbest and smelliest), still awaited patiently, not even attempting to take cover or bring out their shields. I had only 10 arrows left, at this point, but I took 'em down to be sure. Unfortunately, while I was busy concentrating on the dummies, half-a-dozen more damn near got the drop on me. I drew me sword and the real fight began. Two of them, I noticed, were the resident pointy-object flingers, and I quickly dodged their projectiles while another three came at me, swords in hand. I slew them and managed to get back aways, determined to make me last two arrows count. I put one in another of the bandits, and me last missed.
Another two bandits came at me, one with hammer, the other with sword and shield. The swordsman managed to wound me, using his companion as a sacrificial lamb, but in the end, he fell like the others. I chased the survivors down into the valley, which was probably a mistake on me part, but I was drunk with blood by that point and Busey kept chanting "KILL! KILL! KILL!" so what was I to do?
I eviscerated them and, and Busey painted "BUSEY WUZ HERE!" On their shack with their own blood whilst I looted the place...I took Iron, wool, furs, and oil, which would catch me a good bit in Yalen, enough to buy me a better sword...I made the weaponsmith promise to give me old one a good home as I said a tearful goodbye. I was sad until I tested the new one...it was more balanced than me previous weapon, easier to wield. May it smite many a foe!
Also, when I got back, I heard that the Vaegir had declared war on the Swadians. Undoubtedly, Yaroface wants Curaw back. I wonder if I should get involved...Nah!
A great chapter again!
spartan012
I love the dancing part.
MatthaisRagnarsson
killer110 说:
Busey can't die unless Connor gets some sort of psychiatric treatment, or dies himself.
spartan012 说:
Thanks. I kinda wish M&B had pose mods like Obilvion, for the purpose of more interesting screenshots. Right now I have to make Connor take a swing or throw a punch and pray I can hit ctrl-insert at the right time. Then again, after seeing some of the crap Oblivion players have used those mods for, maybe I don't.
Captured Joe 说:
Thank ye. Connor, Busey, Stefan, Vlad and I appreciate it.
spartan012
MatthaisRagnarsson 说:
Here's a tip. Press Ctrl + F9 and you can slow time down.
DarkShogun417
Knight
spartan012 说:
There we go.
MatthaisRagnarsson
No, because I've been too busy making progress on that accursed paper I had to write on the state reformatory THATISEATINGMYDAMNEDSOUL.
Reformation is evil .
Burn the heretics!
.Burn the heretics!
In the archery screenshots it looks like the targeting reticule is candy corn...
...hmmm I wonder...
...hmmm I wonder...
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