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Ok I modified the files according the wiki instructions to allow me to marry Alyssa but I am not getting option in-game in my current save, now does this require a new save or did I miss a step; please help with this.

Alright now I've played diplomacy for a while know and I have established my kingdom (Well established in air quotes as I am a nearly successful Swadian Revolt) and I made Deshavi a Vassel, now when I asked to marry her she says no there are other suiters that have captured my heart, which is...