Oooohhhhh....
I'm a river pirate,
and life sure is well.
Sailing down the coast,
riding the swell.
There's nought a group of Swadians,
Nor Vaegars than can end
My raving band of bandits
From landlocked corners to river bends,
I have an axe, I have a sheild
My men have horses and many-a-spear
My enemies do become friendly
When they see my stash of beer
There's ale for all, fresh meat too,
In fact its quite a treat.
However things get rather messy
when they learn it was horse meat.
The bread was all stolen,
and its cow patties anyway,
The beer, you have reason to fear
Since it was made from hay.
And although we had plenty of ale
You might find it to be pretty stale
And even the armor, heavy mail
Cut from a water pail.
The knives which we dined with
Might have looked quite nice.
But upon closer inspection,
They were infested with lice.
Pale is the skin of the men who ate
And dined with me on this fine day,
And if they are still here in the morrow
Then they've been dead since yesterday.