Sky Warden said:
I recently became King Stannis' vassal and I have 75 relationship with him. I asked to be affiliated to his family, and he said no. I wonder if it's locked or my relation is just not high enough?
I didn't really find a good answer from here:
http://mountandblade.wikia.com/wiki/Marriage
But from my experience it's based on 4 things:
1. Your renown
2. Your relationship level with the lord
3. Your relationship level with the lady.
4. Where your relationship 'quest' is with the lady.
From my experience if you want to wed a certain woman the process are these steps:
1. Build up enough reputation with her lord for her to be present when you enter their keep.
2. Win a tournament, then dedicate it to her when you introduce yourself to her.
3. Say you're her admirer, then meet with her several times, telling her poems etc etc. There are quests you can do for ladies but I've never done them?
4. After you get your relationship to the teens, propose.
5. Once she says yes, go talk to her lord and ask for permission.
What you're doing is basically steps 1 and 5, so it's an uphill battle. When I've done playthroughs where I have a massive renown before bothering to get a bride it's much, much easier.