And no one said it had to be "cheaty". But again, many WANT it to be. Just like people want unlimited companions, governors, parties and workshops, completely eliminating span of control progression, and giving themselves a massive unmitigated advantage over every NPC clan, ignoring all the ways they already have those advantage. At a minimum, 50% of the asks from posters are really just pushing a power fantasy with game systems that that further favor the player, which is not the game I'm looking for, so of course I wouldn't want more of that hardcoded into the game.
I envision plenty of great messenger systems. Having full conversations without a delay on the back and forth isn't one of them. Of course I'd want warnings to war, with an option to hand over a border fort or adjust whatever the tribute amount is in their favor. There's plenty of good ideas. But I also see the game in a decent "neutral" spot for players to adjust things to their liking in the very least. Just some of your reactions acting like everyone has to want the "exact" change you want is actually more proof to leave certain things alone.