Yeah the amount of things you can actually do with your companion parties is ridiculous. You should be able to command them and also as you say give them items, food or money. I also think that you should be able to control wages to parties and they will grow and act accordingly, with some limits ofcourse.
I want to be able to award my parties. Why should a total newcomer get the same treatment as an old faithfull commander that have been around for many years.
I would also like deeper traits that actually make these people act in different ways.